


To Russia, With Love

by Emmeg, sunflowersandstars (Emmeg)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Adults, Aged-Up Character(s), Anxiety, Canon Compliant, Cheese, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Future Fic, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Kisses, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Russia, Sick Character, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Stress Relief, Travel, Traveling, descriptions of getting sick, lots of cheese, yakulev - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-09 17:11:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8900926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmeg/pseuds/Emmeg, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmeg/pseuds/sunflowersandstars
Summary: When soon-to-be college graduate, Lev, reunites with a work-weary Yaku, he decides they could both use a vacation. It's a trip that will define their friendship forever.





	1. Chance Meeting

               Yaku ducks his head, watching the fluorescent lights move like rippling camera flashes against the gray tile of the store. He walks straight toward the accessories section. People move past him, forward, behind, sideways, crisscrossing over each other’s paths in tall lines of neutral colors. Once inside the alcove of leather, buckles, and sunglasses he pauses. Why did he come here again? The long shifts of staring at a screen are starting to get to him.

A child standing in the basket of a grocery cart eyes him quietly. His mother, oblivious, grips the cell phone in her hand and studies a line of jewelry on the counter. Yaku pushes ahead into the socks, away from the kid’s non-blinking stare. Among the shelves of colored women’s tights and leggings, he tries to take stock again.

There was a reason, right? Something he needed to do here other than waste time and avoid responsibilities. His mind is curiously blank as the display of patterned spandex fizzes in and out of focus.

A tall figure moves along the shelves to the left of Yaku, signaling that it’s time to find a new place to sort out his muddled mind. Turning slowly, he meanders to the end of the row then stops at the exclamation of his own name.

“Yaku-san?!”

A horrible seeping dread starts in his stomach, he’s not ready to talk to anyone today. Yaku glances back at the end of the row where the taller figure has turned the corner. Incredulity replaces his initial trepidation.

“Lev?”

It’s definitely his old kohai. He looks leaner if that’s possible. All remnants of childhood softness stretched thin over his gangly frame. The long planes of his face stopping only at the hard angles of his cheekbones and jaw, his pale hair has grown long on top and flops over his forehead in what looks like a closely buzzed undercut, though it’s hard to see under the battered red baseball hat on his head. The green eyes are almost exactly the same deep shade from his memory.

“Yaku-san! It is you.” His thin lips stretch even wider, encompassing the whole lower half of his face in a toothy smile.

Yaku feels his lips lift upward as well. “Lev Haiba.” He moves his hands onto his hips, an unconscious habit to make himself feel on equal footing with people taller than him. Though admittedly, no one makes him feel half as small as the half-Russian. “I never thought I’d run into you here.” He felt a jolt of shock as Lev ducks toward him, arms outstretched, and is briefly lifted off the ground into a bony hug.  “Lev! For god’s sake!” Yaku struggles and knocks a foot against the other’s shin before being placed back on solid ground. “We are grown-ass adults! Don’t do that!”

Lev has the decency to at least look bashful. “Sorry Yaku!” Then mutters something under his breath.

“What was that?”

“I said, you didn’t mind so much in high school.” He shrugs looking down at him with narrowed, cat-like eyes.

“Yeah, well.” Yaku is starting to feel a familiar exasperation wash over him. “That was over four years ago. And these days I don’t expect grocery-store acquaintances to sweep me off my feet.”

Lev wiggles his eyebrows in response. “I swept Yaku-san off his feet?”

“I meant literally.” He snaps. When had that flirty attitude emerged? “So what are you doing here? In Fukui.” He tacked on the clarification at the end, suddenly worried he might find out a former teammate was in the store for women’s tights or something equally disturbing.

“Looking for you!” Lev smiles brightly.

“What? Why?” Then in a dark voice, “How did you know I was here?”

Lev guffaws hideously. “Not in the store! It’s is just good luck that we ran into each other. I was on my way to your apartment.”

“Oh.” He moves to walk down the nearest aisle. “So what’s with the impromptu visit?”

“No reason.” There’s a mischievous gleam in his eye.

Yaku makes the grumpiest sound he can muster.

 

Turns out, Lev came to Fukui just to annoy him. His too-loud laughter echoes off the brick and cement of the cloistered apartment buildings as they both clomp up to Yaku’s door.

It isn’t the first time his former teammate has come to visit him. Yaku tries determinedly not to think about last year when it had been warmer out, and Lev decided fishing was just the right kind of activity for them to catch up with each other. To say the least, it wasn’t.

Since graduating from high school Lev has made it a point to stay in touch. Not just with Yaku, but Kuroo and a few of the other teammates.  He still isn’t sure if it’s endearing or just annoying. Usually, Lev just called or texted. Visits are rare, and not usually a complete surprise. What is this doofus up to now?

“Why did you go to the store in the first place?” Lev is saying, “That walk was so long, and you didn’t even remember what you went there for. What a waste!”

Yaku sighs at the familiar whine as he fumbles with his keys, finally allowing entrance into the cold room beyond.

“I don’t know. I just needed to get out of the office and I didn’t want to go home yet.”

“So can I stay over tonight? It’s really ok?” The half giant bounds into his apartment with the change of subject, practically making himself at home as he asks.

“Yeah, I told you a million times. I don’t have plans this weekend anyway.” And that much is true. Like most weekends, Yaku has been looking forward to savoring the few days off work by sleeping in, lying around the apartment, and running a few errands. Adult life is so boring. Of course with Lev spending the night, he’ll have to rearrange when he goes to the bank and posts that bill… Lev shakes him out of the dull mental scheduling by spilling a few of the cans from his grocery bag onto the floor.

“Whoops! Sorry Yaku!”

“Man, I forgot what a klutz you are.”

Together they gather up the cans and other groceries and stack them neatly in the pantry.

“So.” Yaku pulls a few cans off the shelf. “Dinner? And you want to spend the night?”

Lev nods enthusiastically and pulls the baseball hat off his head, dumping it with his windbreaker on a stool. “Yes, please!” He does have an undercut. The new hairstyle looked good on him. Weirdly good.

“Right. Let’s get cooking.”

“And after dinner,” A pause.

“What?” Yaku looks up from lighting the stove. “You wanna watch a movie or something?”

Lev hesitates again. It seems like a strange halt for him.

“Yeah.” He finally decides. “Something funny!”

The night is winding down and Yaku finds himself curled up under a blanket on the couch beside Lev. The empty bowls of stir fry stacked on the coffee table are beginning to fill with empty candy wrappers. It was a simple meal; one he was used to making alone on weeknights. Even so, he was quietly pleased when Lev raved exaggeratedly over every mouthful.

“You’re such a good cook Yaku! Can I have more? What did you just pour in yours? Oh! Put some in mine! Can I make stroganoff for you sometime?”

Now they are sucking quietly on some cinnamon hard candies he found tucked back in the cupboard. Lev had excitedly turned on a playlist of rock music to show him a while ago, and it continues to drone softly in the corner. They hadn’t found the need to turn on a movie, having so much to talk about and catch up on.

Yaku tugs absently at the curling hair creeping down his neck as Lev gesticulates wildly. Describing the last volleyball match he played in.

“Is playing on your college team a lot different than high school?” Yaku interrupts. 

His former kohai sucks on the hard candy, considering. Yaku can hear it clack against his teeth. This also seems to be a new thing: the thinking before speaking. Of course, Lev is still the blabbiest, most obnoxious person to ever exist, but Yaku remembers cringing around him a lot more in high school.

“All the players are really good, and maybe more serious,” he says at last. There’s a pink tinge starting around his mouth; remnants of the spicy cinnamon candy. “But I think our old team from the first year was a lot like that too!”

“What about your second and third year? After all of us graduated?”

“Hmm… well I was the ace, so we were strong.” Yaku feels the familiar burn of second-hand embarrassment at his blunt statement. “But the third year, after Kenma graduated, things kinda fell apart.” He admits with a shrug. “He was the Brain after all.”

Yaku nods. Kenma was the glue of their old strength, even if he didn’t see it that way. “I wonder if anyone besides you, Kuroo and Yamamoto kept up playing after school.” He wonders idly.

Lev gapes at him. “But. But Yaku-san played for a college team.” He states it like an indisputable fact.

“Yeah, I did for the first two years.” Yaku tries not to look as guilty as he feels under Lev’s shocked face. “But I quit after that.”

“I didn’t know that!”

Yaku squirms at the short, childish response. “Things got stressful for me. I had to take a break.”

Lev regards him clinically for a moment and Yaku is afraid he’s going to be interrogated further. “But things got better right? And then you graduated.” Lev brakes into a relieved grin. “And now Yaku-san has a degree!”

“Well yeah.” He laughs. “A degree and a boring office job. Living the dream.” Lev predictably misses the sarcasm.

“Can I see it?”

“What?”

“Your diploma.”

“Oh.” he waves a hand, “I think it’s in storage somewhere.”

Lev gasps loudly. “It should be on your wall! Right there.” He points to a blank space between a bookshelf and the small television set. “I can’t wait to get mine.” He gushes. “I’m going to frame it and everything. It’s too much work not to show off, Yaku-san.”

Yaku snorts at the reprimand in his voice. “Well, at least you’ll be working with your degree in your job. It makes sense for a diplomat to show it off.”

He’s coming to terms with it slowly. When Lev first told him he was studying political science with the intention to become a diplomat to Russia, Yaku had to physically cover his mouth with his hands to stop from laughing aloud. There’s no way to picture this overgrown child doing anything that requires half the tact diplomacy does. After a few years, however, he’s beginning to notice how much more mature and determined his former student is.

“You use journalism skills at your office though!” Lev insists.

“Vaguely.”

Because he’s run out of arguments or tired of the conversation completely, Lev stretches out one of his lengthy arms and grips the hair at the back of Yaku’s head in response.

“Let go of me.” The younger just grins wickedly before releasing him, stroking his hair back into place as he settles into the couch again.

“Speaking of diplomacy.” Lev begins.

“Hah!” Yaku massages his head where his hair had been grabbed. And waits.

It seems his friend has lapsed into silence again. What is up with that? Yaku glances curiously at the tower of wiry strength next to him. Lev’s face seems pinker. Maybe the cinnamon is irritating his throat? His hands twist together nervously and he has that look on his face like he’s going to tell him something. What’s making Lev so nervous he’s reduced to speechlessness?

Yaku braces for whatever Lev is going to convey, but a breathy laugh escapes him instead. “Never mind. I’ll tell you tomorrow.”

“Tell me what?”

“Nothing. Yaku, you look kinda tired. You want to go to bed?”

He is pretty tired. “Maybe.”

“Okay! I’ll take the couch if that’s alright.”

“Of course it is. Let me get you some sheets.”

Yaku pulls down some bedding and helps Lev make up the living room seating into a makeshift cot. He should probably insist on the couch for himself. Lev is taller and would be more comfortable in the bed. But then, would that make it even more awkward being his apartment? Too tired to ponder this worry or Lev’s long-standing silences anymore, Yaku bids him goodnight and collapses at last into his own bed.

 

Lev is sitting on the couch in a nest of blankets, sheets, and pillows munching on some cold cereal when Yaku walks into the living room the next morning. Still crunching, he manages a grin and waves his spoon at him. Blearily, Yaku stumbles into the couch and sits down on the edge of the armrest. Then he remembers its Lev, which doesn’t require a polite distance for personal space. He slumps down onto the edge of the nest and folds his feet under his legs. Lev continues spooning the last of the cereal into his wide mouth, smirking slightly as Yaku stretches and pops his creaky joints.

“Sorry I slept so long.” He finally rasps. “Glad you found some food.” Lev sets the empty bowl down on the side table behind him and reaches his lanky arms toward Yaku. It takes him a moment, but he soon realizes he is beckoning him to continue stretching. Sighing, he lays his elbows in the other boy’s palms and leans forward, as Lev pulls back, releasing another pop in his upper back.

“Nice one!” Lev compliments, his mouth no longer full of food. They separate and Yaku cracks a knuckle in his left hand.

“So what do you want to do today?” He’s pleased to hear his voice is a little less raspy now.

“Want me to make you breakfast?”

“What’re you going to make? Cereal?”

“Of course not!” Lev looks affronted, and completely ignores the sarcasm. “I’ll make you something amazing. Can I use the kitchen?”

This giant kid is asking permission? He never used to do that. What’s he angling for? Yaku studies him suspiciously. “Please?” he wheedles.

“Fine. As long as you clean up after.” He finally concedes. Lev jumps up and pushes the rest of the blankets over Yaku. “Take your bowl with you!” He calls out mutedly from underneath.

Yaku slumps beneath the still-warm sheets and blankets. He feels more tired than usual this morning. Normally on Saturdays, he at least has enough energy to get some errands and chores done. Right now all he feels like doing is sitting on this couch forever. He leans back, pulls the sheets off his face and listens as his old kouhai bangs around in the kitchen. The blankets smell like Lev. It’s not necessarily a bad smell, just very distinctly Lev. There are hints of ultra-spicy cologne and his more subtly scented hair product. It’s mingling together with the boring unscented laundry detergent smell of the sheets. They are all nice aromas on their own but mixed together it just makes him think of dirty laundry. Groaning he sits up, wishing his nose weren’t being assaulted. Something is definitely cooking now and beginning to overpower everything else.

“Is this a Russian thing?” he asks suspiciously. The younger nods enthusiastically. He’s in the middle of tilting the pan over the stove around in a circle, his tongue pinched between his lips. “Crepes?” He guesses.

“Blini!”

It really does smell good.

“Can I do anything to help?” Yaku wanders into the kitchen area.

“No!” Lev literally shouts. At least he looks a bit abashed at the outburst when Yaku raises an eyebrow. “I’m doing this for you, Yaku-san. So just… Just sit?” He looks pleadingly over at him over the pan. Sighing, the former libero gives up and sits on a bar stool watching as Lev swirls a new blin into the pan. Finally, once he has a stack of the thin, buttery pancakes ready, he pulls out an old container of raspberry jam Yaku had forgotten was in the fridge, along with a new container of sour cream and sweetened condensed milk he must have brought himself at the store yesterday.

“You put all that on them?”

“YES! You’re going to love them Yaku.” His voice is so loud, Yaku winces. As weird as it feels dipping crepes in sour cream, they are really good, especially with the condensed milk sweetening everything else. Lev leans over Yaku’s head and watches him dip more jam onto a blin. “You like it?”

Right. He’d almost forgotten how much reassurance and praise this kid requires. “It’s really good Lev. I love it.”

“Really?!”

“Yes. Good job. You can make them for me anytime.”

Suddenly a pointed chin drops onto the top of Yaku’s head. Lev’s lanky arms wind around his shoulders and squeeze him tightly. “I will!”

“Th-thanks.” He splutters.

“Mmm…” Lev squeezes him again and Yaku feels his face getting hot. Finally, he is released and they both go back to eating.

“So what do you want to do today Yaku-san?” He just shrugs in answer. “Want to walk to the park?”

“Maybe later.” Yaku sighs. “Kinda want to just sit for a while.”

“Ok!” Lev agrees happily.

After breakfast Lev leads Yaku over to the couch where they both collapse into the blankets that once made up Lev’s bed. The dirty dishes are still stacked haphazardly in the sink and Yaku is pretty sure someone left the sour cream out. Seems like his promise to clean up after himself went unobserved.

Lev turns on the TV and instantly they seem to be transported back to those long high school years. Days spent at the Habia’s after school, arms and legs aching from flying falls, lounging on the couch and eating anything that was lying around. The TV quietly fuzzing, and listening to the strange quirked kind of Japanese peppered with Russian exclamations and phrases Yaku had come to associate with a gangly first year, a warm family, and life-long friends. Now that he thinks back on how close they all were, it seems strange the only person to remain in constant contact with him is Lev.

“So, Alisa is enjoying life in grad school?” The question comes out of nowhere but Lev doesn’t seem to notice or care.

“Yeah!” He clicks the remote languidly, “She’s super busy right now so we haven’t talked for a while, but after next month, she’ll be done with tests.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. She’s awesome.” Finally settling for a goofy looking game show he pushes the remote aside. “She’s still dating that doctor guy too. Seems like he makes her happy.”

“That’s good,” Yaku says lamely, remembering his embarrassing crush on her in high school. “And you’ll have to do some kind of interning soon, right?” He tries to hurriedly change the subject so Lev will talk at length about himself and Yaku can forget these uncomfortable, teenage-y thoughts.

“Yes. Um, Yaku. I wanted to talk to you about that.”

“What, your internship?”

“Yeah. Um.” He staring at anywhere but Yaku, the TV, the potted plant on the windowsill, the remote. Is Lev finally going to tell him why he’s been acting so weird?

“What is it, Lev?” Yaku pats a hand patronizingly against his shoulder.

“Um.” His cheeks have reached a nice rosy pink now. Yaku wants to laugh but holds back. This is obviously important to him.

“I am going to Russia for a week and I want to bring someone. Willyougowithme?”

Yaku blinks. “To Russia?”

Lev nods, the blush spreading across his neck.

Yaku feels like his eyebrows are going to rise off his face and float away.

“Are you serious Lev? Russia?”

He nods and whips out his phone. “It’s not really for my internship. I just want to go myself, so I have a better idea about the people I am working with and the country I represent.” He glances up shyly. “But I don’t want to go alone and no one has time to go with me.”

“Oh, and I do?”

He has the grace to blush at the comment, but pushes on, relentless. “Well, you don’t have to come. But I just thought it would be fun, because I love spending time with you, and you’ll get out and see a new place so…”

“You saying I need to get out more?”

Lev smirks and gives him an affirmative little nod. “Yes. You need to get out with me.”

Yaku rolls his eyes. More weird pickup lines? Where is he getting these? “Isn’t it dangerous? I thought diplomatic relations were bad ever since that fisherman guy died. You remember? When we were kids?”

“Oh, you mean the Kuril Islands Dispute?” He spouts off knowledgeably. “It doesn’t mean we can’t go in. I just have to get pre-arrival visas.”

Yaku just stares.

“I can get them!” Lev practically yells then continues on in a rush. “I’ll get everything worked out, and tell you what days to get off work, and I’ll get the visas and I’ll set up all the plane and train stuff and then we’ll go and spend a week in Russia and take pictures and it will be fun Yaku! C’mon!”

He considers slowly, thinking aloud. “Well, I haven’t taken any vacation days yet. And if you set the itinerary for us…”

Lev’s nodding along like a giant bobblehead. “I’ll take care of everything so all you have to do is come.”

“Well, obviously I can help you pay for some stuff.” He interjects.

“So you’re coming?” Lev lights up like a festival lantern.

Yaku sighs. What is he getting himself into? He and Lev barely hang out once and year and suddenly they’re going to a foreign country together?

“Yeah, sure. I’ll go to Russia with you Lev.”


	2. Departures and Arrivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yaku and Lev make plans and follow through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so here is the rest of what I have for this story so far. It too me a while to proof-read and organize it. Sorry about that. The next two chapters are a lot more disjointed and drabble-y so it could take a bit longer before I have them in some semblance of read-ability.   
> Thanks so much for the encouragement so far:)

The next two weeks are spent in a haze of meticulous planning, boring appointments with the bank and passport office, and long late-night phone calls with Lev that interrupt Yaku’s otherwise unvarying schedule. More than one co-worker has already remarked on the dark circles under his eyes. He’s not sure if he’s ever been so stressed, even during finals week back in college.

In a fit of anxiety, Yaku spent all last week packing his suitcase and then dumping it out and repacking purely for practice. He even spent an embarrassing amount of time looking up YouTube videos on how to effectively pack clothes by rolling them in military style. His family went on vacations from time to time, sure, but he’s never left Japan before. And throughout his childhood, his parents were always there to take care of the planning. Even in college, the trips he went on were for Volleyball matches or study trips that were laid out by the school. Doing everything himself is bringing out the worst of his perfectionism.

Of course, Lev has been trying to help in his own laid-back fashion, but it does little to relieve Yaku’s nerves. He’s made an itinerary of where they’ll go and what he wants to see, what hotels, Airbnb’s, and hostels they’ll stay at, and even purchased railway tickets. But throughout, he always just talks dreamily about what it will be like, what food he wants to try, and what each place is most famous for.

At the moment, he’s on the phone with Lev watching the clock steadily creep closer to midnight and feeling his anxiety bubble silently beneath his prepared calm. 

“I don’t know. I just have a bad feeling. The more I look into this trip the more worried I get.” He confesses and listens to the other boy’s breathing on the other line.

“Yaku.” There’s a pause after his name making his heart stutter nervously in his chest. “If you don’t want to come, you don’t have to.” Lev finally says.

Thinking about this bumbling college student going on his own, to a place Yaku is now imaging as a frozen tundra full of grumpy stoic farmers sets him even more on edge.

“No. I want to go. I guess I’m just scared.”

“Yaku-san is scared?”

“Of course!” He cries indignantly. “We’re going to a country filled with people who hate us.”

“They won’t hate us.”

“They already do!”

“Hey, take a deep breath,” Lev advises. “You haven’t even met anyone yet. They might love you.”

Yaku snorts.

“Are you breathing?” the other inquires.

“I’m busy snorting at you.”

Lev cackles at that. Once he calms down though he’s serious again.

“Hey, don’t you have work in the morning? You should go to bed!”

Yaku glances at the glaring red digital clock face again. “Yeah, probably.”

“Ok. Go to sleep then. And don’t worry. I’ll be with you the whole time and I like you.”

Yaku chuckles. “Ok. Thanks, Lev.”

 

The ice crystals that formed on Kuroo’s car during the night still haven’t completely thawed by the time he parks outside Yaku’s apartment the morning of their departure. Stuffing his backpack into the trunk, Yaku takes a moment to regard the frost encrusted exterior.

“I’m really the only person you know around here who owns a car?” His long-limbed friend releases a long yawn after the question, blearily wiping a hand down his face.

“Yes. I’m sorry.” Yaku snaps. “For some reason, I thought you might also jump at the chance to tease me before seeing us off, but if you’re too tired, all the better.” He feels stressed enough to break apart. The fact that he hasn’t slept for more than five hours in the last three days certainly isn’t helping his mood.

“Woah, woah.” Kuroo holds up a hand in defense. “I’ll get to the teasing. Just let the caffeine do its work.” He takes another sip out of his stainless-steel mug as he talks. “You’ve got a suitcase, right?” He snaps the lid of the mug into a locked position and sets in on the passenger seat.

“Yeah, it’s inside. Hold on.” Yaku leaves the trunk open and stomps up the steps to his apartment.

Inside it feels cold and unfamiliar. He’s locked away everything of importance, cleaned and sanitized all surfaces, and the only thing left out is a glass he was drinking out of earlier which he quickly dumps into the sink. He can leave it for two weeks. Right?

Wrong. Yaku seizes the glass and uses a soapy dishrag to clean it. As he’s setting it back into the cupboard and throwing the rag into a laundry basket, Kuroo comes in.

“What’s the holdup?” he asks watching as Yaku straightens up some more.

“Nothing, sorry.” He mutters, going into the bedroom where his suitcase sits, zipped and locked up.

Taking a deep breath, he closes his eyes and imagines everything he put inside. Did he forget anything? There’s no way he missed something essential, right? And they can just pick up stuff if he did forget.

Long arms slide around his middle and he’s surprised to find Kruoo hugging him from behind, head resting on his shoulder.

“We’re going to be late.” He whispers warningly.

Yaku jolts. What time is it?

Kuroo chuckles at his reaction and draws back. “Not that late. I’m assuming you asked me to be here this early so you’d have like four hours to check in.”

“Yeah. Let’s go” Yaku shakes his head at the former captain and pulls free of the embrace. 

Kuroo snickers all the way to the car, lugging the suitcase behind him.

“You know, I feel bad for Lev. Vacation Yaku is not a fun Yaku.”

He wants to say something in retaliation, but really has no place to talk. If anyone would know, Kuroo would having been on so many volleyball trips with him.

They ride in silence, Kuroo still being a little subdued by the early morning, and Yaku being overall a tired, stressed wreck. The airport isn’t far, and this early, the traffic is practically nonexistent, but he can

still feel his heart hammering in his chest. Lately, he’s been almost tempted to get checked out for heart palpitations, they happen so regularly.

“I still can’t believe you got talked into this,” Kuroo says conversationally after a while.

“Yeah, me neither,” Yaku admits. “Sometimes that kid is weirdly persuasive.”

“Either that or you just can’t say no to him.”

“I can say no.” He assures his bed-head riddled classmate. “If anyone can say no, I can.”

“I guess you’re pretty harsh.” Kuroo allows, “But you seem to give in as much as you deny him.”

Yaku huffs and stares out the window.

They get to the airport quickly and Kuroo even finds a place to park so he can go in to see him off. Despite his early threat to tease, Kuroo been pretty quiet, even gentle so far.

“You okay?” He asks the question again as they truck their way past the winding crowds and rolling suitcases.

“I’m fine. Why do you keep asking?” He says exasperatedly.

“Sorry. It’s just.” He pauses, “You look really terrible Yaku. Are you getting sick?”

“Just stressed out.”

“Yeah? Well, try to tone it down. Lev is so excited you’re going with him.” He smirks down at him. “Did you know, after you agreed to go with him, that idiot texted me nonstop for like, three days?”

“What?”

Kuroo just laughs. “He was ecstatic. But I really doubt he knows what he signed up for. Please don’t ruin this for him.”

“I won’t!” Yaku grouses.

“You say that, but I know what a downer you are.” The other warns.

Yaku just sticks his tongue out at him.

They find Lev and his family right on schedule and it looks like they already checked him in as well. The giant waves Yaku and Kuroo over with an exaggerated frenzy of limbs so they quickly start over, suitcase wheels clattering behind them. Yaku doesn’t miss when Kuroo’s eyebrows jump as he sees Alisa clutching her handsome, almost-fiancée’s arm.

“Yaku!” Lev squeals when the get without shouting distance. “Kuroo-san came too!”

The latter grins at the enthusiastic student and gives a kind of salute to the entire Haiba family. “Hey, Lev, Mr. and Mrs. Habia, Alisa, Mika.”

Mika, Lev and Alisa’s oldest sister smiles shyly at them, probably confused over who they are. She wasn’t around much during Lev’s high school career, but she’s unmistakably Haiba with long, skinny legs, pale shimmering hair, and thin face.

“But where is Yaku-san?” Lev’s mother asks in her strange affected accent, probably referring to his mother.

“My parents couldn’t make it up here today,” Yaku explains. “We said goodbye last week.”

“That’s too bad.” Alisa simpers.

Yaku only nods back jerkily, staring at the ground until his vision is overtaken by a pink jacket as Lev’s mother envelops him in a hug. She mutters something very fast, half-Russian and half-Japanese in his ear. It sounds like “Take care of our Lyovochka!”

And suddenly Yaku and Kuroo get lost in a frenzy of goodbyes and hugs, and laughter and even some watery smiles. The Haiba’s have always been a very physically affectionate bunch, and somehow being lost in what feels like Mrs. Haiba’s third hug, he feels reassured. His own parents are a bit more reserved and shy about showing any kind of emotion, so the quiet dinner of last week and stiff goodbyes and good lucks definitely leave less of an impression than this.

Kuroo slaps his back as the others shuffle away. “Well, you two have fun over there. Don’t let this dork die or anything.”

An outraged cry from Lev shows he heard the comment, but two more goodbye kisses from his sisters and a very awkward pat on the arm from Alisa’s boyfriend seem to placate him.

“Yeah ok.” Yaku laughs shakily.

He can do this. He can go to Russia, come back alive and have a good time. Maybe.

“Let’s go check in Lev.” He nods at Yaku and grabs his bags. With a few last hugs and waves, they finally part from Lev’s family and Kuroo and make their way to airport security.

Despite all his anxious anticipation, the check-in and security lines don’t take that long and soon he and Lev have been shuffled off to the waiting area by their gate. After pushing their luggage into one pile they both collapse onto a bench together.

“Wow! That took forever.” Lev complains happily.

“Yeah, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” Yaku says.

“Did you see that one guard when I took off my shoes?” the younger blurts.

“No. The fat one or the lady?”

“The fat guy! He must have got a whiff or something ‘cause it looked like he wanted to push me through the line faster than everyone else.”

“What?” Yaku splutters a laugh. He’d been too preoccupied trying to get himself through he didn’t notice anything else happening.

“I mean, I was dying too. It was gross.” He shrugs. “But that guy must have been right in the line of fire.”

Yaku lifts his face into a genuine smile at the perplexed look on Lev’s face and before he knows it, starts heaving an honest-to-god belly laugh. After he stops to wipe the wet from his eyes, Lev leans forward with interest.

“What is that?”

“What’s what?”

“Smile again!” he demands.

Hesitantly, Yaku lifts his face into a smile.

“This!” Lev reaches out and draws a few fingers down the right side of his chin. Yaku finds himself staring at a pair of amused, green eyes, chin in Lev’s palm.

“Huh?” He mumbles intelligently.

“Your face keeps pulling down right here. I don’t think it used to.”

“Oh yeah,” Yaku finally slides free of his grasp. “It’s from a scar.”

“How’d you get a scar on the side of your mouth?”

“Caught a ball to the face during a game.” He admits. “It broke my lip and the side of my mouth open and then kept scabbing and ripping off again for a few months.”

“Ow.”

“Yeah, never got a chance to heal over smooth I guess. Makes my smile look kinda weird now.”

“It’s awesome.” Lev indeed looks awed as he reaches out again and dips his thumb over the invisible mark. Yaku hopes his shiver isn’t noticeable.

“What about you, any old scars from your volleyball days?”

“I have this HUGE one on my elbow.” He leans back and begins to roll back his sleeve. “During a receive, I left a huge chunk of skin on the gym floor.”

“Gross.” Yaku wrinkles his nose but Lev merely laughs.

“I remember thinking Yaku-san would be proud of that one.”

The skin on his pale elbow is still taught and pink where the injury healed recently. Without thinking, Yaku puts both hands on the sides of his bent arm and pulls it toward him.

“Looks like it will heal without too much scarring though.” He observes.

“Yeah. They did a good job with it.” After Yaku’s inspection, he tugs his sleeve down again and leans back with a vast grin. Yaku smiles back and feels himself relaxing, if only by a small degree. Lev chuckles and tickles a finger down the line on his chin again, skin barely brushing.

“Cool,” he breathes.

Yaku’s never really paid much mind to the old injury, only noticing the way his smile twists in more recent pictures versus old ones. But if Lev thinks it’s cool or awesome, it might make smiling along during this trip a little easier.

 

The airplane is like any other. All Yaku has to do now is trust that it won’t fall out of the sky. It’s all he really can do at this point anyway.

“You gotta sleep, remember?” Lev advises him as they find their seat and get adjusted. “it’s a long flight to Moscow.”

“Yeah, I’ll try. Can’t promise anything though.”

Lev falls asleep before they even reach cruising altitude. Yaku sighs as he watches the wide frame of his chest rising and falling with long drawn-out breaths. After they reach cruising height and stewards start moving around the cabin, the giant half-Russian mutters in his unconsciousness from time to time. It’s a little distracting, but honestly watching his friend sleep isn’t so bad. It’s kind of adorable, for instance, how his hand is curled up against his chest and those little smacking noises he makes. Okay, those actually get old pretty quickly, and after a few more minutes Yaku has to find a way to refrain from hitting him with his paperback.

How is able to fall asleep so easily? Yaku’s never been able to sleep well outside of his own bed. It’s a matter of being completely alone, in a comfortable place, and having his rituals and familiar routine. Vacations have never been something he does for relaxation. If anything, time away from his schedule and routine make him more stressed than leaving it. He’ll just have to find a way to get some peace on his own. Pulling out headphones, he tries to tune out Lev’s smacking noises and gets immersed in his book again. It’s going to be a long flight, and an even longer trip until he’ll be able to sleep normally. 

 

The plane has begun the descent and Yaku can feel his body tilt with the new angle. Lev snorts awake during the second overhead announcement that crackles over them.

“We’re almost there?” He asks groggily.

Yaku just nods, feeling tight-lipped and tense.

“I’m so excited!” He leans over, pushing into Yaku’s personal space. “Are you ready Yaku-san?”

“Yes.” He replies tersely.

“Reaaally?” comes the expected wheedling. “You look kinda stressed.” He moves a warm hand up to his forehead and brushes back the hair there. “Did you sleep at all?”

He makes a grumpy huff in response and pushes Lev off him, but the younger simply pats his other hand, the one currently doing a death-grip on the armrest, and smiles sympathetically at him then sits back but continues to talk quickly next to his ear.

“Soon we’ll land. And then you will feel better. And we’ll get off and find our luggage. And then we’ll take a train out and see the country a little bit while we go into Moscow. And we’ll find our hotel…” He carries on, oblivious to the stares from other passengers, and details minute parts of the planning Yaku already knows by heart.

“Lev, if you don’t shut up soon, I’ll make you shut up.” His voice is measured and even, but he stops talking at the threat anyway.

The plane jostles them all a few times as it grinds to a slow roll around the runway. Yaku lets out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in. Peering out the peephole-sized window next to him and gets a less-than-thrilling view of a tarmac and airport towers. The flight in had been too cloudy and foggy to really get a good view of many cities they passed overhead. He feels a mixture of excitement and anticipation at the sight of the airport, despite its lackluster appearance.

“You never said flying made you nervous,” Lev whispers next to him, apparently unable to keep from chattering for more than a minute.

“It doesn’t. It’s more the thought of being in a different place.” He explains.

“Oh.” Lev doesn’t probe further. Sometimes it’s nice that he’ll just accept things without explanation. Other times it annoys Yaku that he doesn’t get more inquisitive. At the moment, he feels both irritation and gratitude for it.

Getting out of the seats they’ve all become too familiar with over the past several hours is the usual laborious process. Most of the passengers are already trying to stand, knees bent and heads tapping awkwardly against the ceiling. Lev, being an unexpected gentleman reaches up to grab their overhead bags and helps Yaku zip up his other items. Eventually, everyone gets moving and from there it's just a few more steps to being in Moscow.

Of course, right from there, everyone is shuffled through different corridors and walkways until they get to customs and have to wait in a confusing mass of lines and queues. Yaku is actually panicking now. How is he supposed to talk to a Russian customs officer? He knows maybe three words and can’t read Cyrillic to save his life. He’s keeping so close to Lev he could practically be tucked under his arm and scooped off the ground. Maybe he’s unconsciously hoping Lev will do just that. When a burly, bearded officer behind one of the desks is free, he makes a gesture to call the next person forward. Lev moves purposefully forward. Yaku is caught between wondering if he should stay or go with him and ends up trotting after him like a lost toddler.

At the desk, the officer regards them with an overwhelming air of boredom and holds out his hand expectantly. He grunts something in Russian to which Lev takes an alarmingly long time to reply to. Luckily, he does reply, haltingly and with long awkward pauses. Yaku can hear him searching for the right words in the stuttering silences. The guard nods and takes the set of visas Lev is holding out.

“Your passport,” Lev warns him quickly in Japanese.

He fumbles for his papers in the top pocket of his bag while the guard growls something else at them. He passes his documents and passport booklet over and Lev makes a motion toward Yaku, talking in his loud, accented Russian to the guard. It takes a few moments, and the man behind the counter has to call over another woman to look at their visas and passports for a moment, but then with rapid stamping and signing, their things are returned, and Lev and Yaku are pushed through a barrier to the outer part of the airport.

“We did it!” Lev delightedly dances a little celebratory jig.

Yaku wrings his hands together to stop them shaking. “I thought you said you could speak Russian.”

Lev makes a pout with his lower lip. “I was speaking Russian.”

Now he feels a twinge of guilt for hurting Lev’s feelings on top of the surging panic overwhelming him. “Yeah, but really slowly. I thought we were going to be arrested.”

“I told you I’m not fluent. It takes time and I need practice. But I’ll probably be perfectly fluent by the time we leave.” He finishes with the same air of confidence he used to use when talking about his future ace status on the team, and that at least makes Yaku smile.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.”

He makes a big show of clutching his heart at that. “Yaku-san apologized!”

“Oh, shut up. I’m not a monster.”

Lev giggles “Definitely not.”

They aren’t even out of the airport yet and Yaku already feels like he stands out like a sore thumb. Most people are babbling in incomprehensible languages. He recognizes a couple of simple Russian phrases Lev has been trying to teach him, English, and often something that sounds French. There were a few Japanese people on their flight of course, but now he and Lev look like obvious outsiders. Luckily, they aren’t alone in looking like travel-weary tourists. Yaku’s not looking forward to the coming days of that.

“You got most of your money changed already, right?”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

Lev points out a currency exchange counter as they reach the bag collection site. “Okay.” He heaves a sigh and continues watching the crowd. Yaku takes a moment to regard his companion in favor of the unfamiliar, undulating environment around them. His backpack is slung over one shoulder and tucked under one armpit, the gray windbreaker he has on rustling with every slight movement. He has one long-fingered hand on the handle of Yaku’s suitcase while they wait for his own. The sporty, red sneakers he seems to wear near-constantly have become a familiar sight at this point. They are obviously worn for comfort with the tread on the sides are worn thin and dirty.

Lev catches him staring and wags an eyebrow at him. “Like what you see Yaku-san?”

Unrattled by the near-constant flirting at this point, Yaku just nods. “I like your shoes. They look comfortable.”

For some reason, Lev blushes at that comment.

“Don’t let it go to your head. They’re just shoes.” Lev nods quickly. “Isn’t that your bag?”

His head whips around quickly to catch his suitcase thunking down the conveyer belt and scrambles through a few people to grab it. Yaku steadies his own as he runs off. Once back at his side, Lev’s eyes crinkle as his face goes into a huge grin.

“Ready to see Moscow?”

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

 

Hailing a taxi is pretty easy once outside. The spring air here is a lot colder than Japan, and while he welcomed the crisp, biting breeze after the long, cramped airplane at first, now it’s getting just slightly uncomfortable, making the tip of his nose and cheeks go numb and red. Yaku insisted on taking a taxi instead of the metro to their hotel. Lev looked a little disappointed but seems to have accepted it now as he packs their bags in next to them in the backseat. He’s just too tired to deal with much more crowds and language barriers than they need to. Lev gives some slow, faltering directions, but the driver takes it in stride and before he knows it, they are speeding toward the city.

It’s a quiet ride. Yaku gets lost in the quickly darkening landscapes outside and the first twinkling lights from passing towns and streetlamps flicking on. The buildings look so different and yet so same from the ones from home. He’s not sure if it’s pathetic he’s already getting a little homesick, or if this is normal. Turning to look back at his companion, he catches Lev looking at his profile, a sad little smile on his lips.

“What?”

He shrugs. “I can’t believe we’re here. That you’re here.”

Yaku smiles. “Yeah. It’s kind of unbelievable.”

“I’m so glad you came.” Lev leans back, making the leather seat groan. “It’s like a dream come true.”

Yaku smiles a secret smile to his own reflection in the car window before making a hum of agreement.

 

After finding their hotel, checking into their room, and dumping their bags inside, Yaku lets himself collapse face-first on one of the beds. It’s infuriating that just traveling, sitting in a seat, and simply being out in public have exhausted him this much. He barely did anything all day. Lev even did most of the talking for him. Of course, he was pretty stressed all week leading up to the trip. Instead of slowing down, work seemed to ratchet up right before he left. And all the planning has been pretty stressful on its own.

Now they have this room. Their own room. A quiet place in the middle of the chaos. Yaku sighs heavily and rolls over to check the time. A streak of yellow light on the floor shows Lev is in the bathroom and after listening to the sounds of running water for a moment, he emerges. He grins at Yaku, still lying prone on the bed while staring up at him.

“Hey, Yaku-san. Do you want to go out and walk around? Maybe find somewhere to eat?”

“Yeah.” Yaku heaves himself up with another sigh, “Yeah. Just let me get washed up a bit.” He trails off once he starts unzipping his bag. All his belongings seem to have survived the journey, though most are cold to the touch. Clothes rolled into perfect cylinders and pressed tight against his separate toiletry bag and shoes. He pulls out the shoes and jumps when a hand falls on his back.

“You okay?”

Lev leans over him, concern leaking into his eyes.

“Yes. I’m fine.” He laughs off his initial shock somewhat breathlessly.

“M’kay. Just let me know when you tired, though. We should sleep lots tonight so we can see everything tomorrow.”

“Definitely!” Yaku agrees, pulling his toiletry bag with him toward the bathroom. He doesn’t know when he won’t feel tired. Seems to be a never-ending state he’s in these days.

 

The restaurant they pick is more of a bakery than anything, but the sandwiches are pretty cheap and taste amazing. They have a cloistered view of a small street somewhere in Moscow and Yaku revels in the bliss of anonymity he feels here. Lev definitely blends in much better, but even if they look like tourists, Yaku can relish the quiet moments like this. Just watching everyday Russians pass down the tiny road, come in and out of the bakery, talk quietly to each other, and feel like an outsider peering into just one ordinary evening in Moscow. Every so often he lets his gaze wander back to his companion.

Lev swings his impossibly long legs from the tall bar stools they’ve chosen. Apparently, it’s a novelty for him not to have his feet touch the ground, one that’s long-ago lost its charm for Yaku. As he munches on food, he keeps his eyes on his phone, taking advantage of the free Wi-Fi here to look up all the places they plan to visit tomorrow.

“Oh! Yaku.” He leans over to show him the too-bright screen. “This museum actually opens earlier than I thought!”

“Mmm.” Yaku nods at him and swallows. “Let's go there.”

“Yes!” Lev hums happily to himself and turns back to his phone.

Yaku watches him for a while before remembering to take another bite of his sandwich. Somehow watching Lev get absorbed in something is absorbing all on its own. It’s not the first time this has happened. He likes seeing how much the other has changed since high school and how much he’s stayed the same. The new undercut haircut is a little jarring, but he’s getting used to it. So too is the new chiseled look his face has to it. His cheekbones seem sharper and his chin pointier. But in other ways he’s just the same. The way his excitement spills over from his face into his vibrating limbs, the way he still taps a finger to his chin when searching for the right words. 

Lev lifts his head and catches Yaku staring. In that moment, full of food in a tiny bakery in Moscow with his old teammate, he experiences a weird sort of contentment despite the overwhelming cloud of stress that’s been threatening to smother him. Yaku reaches out in a familiar gesture to ruffle his hair and Lev graciously complies, bending forward slightly. Yaku runs his finger through the long strands roughly. 

“Spasibo, Lev.” 

Lev grins. “For what?” 

Yaku just shrugs and ruffles his hair again. “For being you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, corrections and comments welcome! I'll be back soon with the next two chapters in the coming month:)


	3. Moments in Moscow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lev and Yaku explore the city and their friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did it! I can't believe it's still January and I got this out. I'm sorry it took so long. I had some trouble editing and I'm still not super satisfied with it, but... oh well. Sorry about any mistakes!

The next day is a blur of activity. Lev takes Yaku almost every place they have crammed onto their itinerary. They spend a lot of time wandering through the red square and the Kremlin, all the while, Lev going over almost every single historical event that’s taken place there as they walk. Yaku is completely floored by his knowledge on the subject and a little surprised that all this talking isn’t making him hoarse.

They also go through St. Basil’s and a couple of other huge Cathedrals. Yaku feels awkward as they pass the few lone people in the pews or lighting candles. The churches give him a strangely empty, hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach, but he can’t deny how beautiful everything inside them is. The gold-encrusted ornaments, the paintings all depicting Christ in horrendous pain, some even have stained-glass with light streaming through them. Lev likes these a lot and takes pictures of them that never turn out.

“Well, at least I’ll remember what they really looked like in-person.” he says after Yaku remarks on it.

They also go across the river to the Tretyakov Gallery. There, Lev seems to have more of a grasp on his Russian, translating interesting things he hears from tour guides, reads on plaques, and overhears from people nearby. Speaking it is a little more difficult, and at every ticket office or lunch counter Yaku has a miniature heart attack as he listens to the choppy flow of his sentences. Not that he has any idea what anyone’s saying. Hypocrite that he is, Yaku barely realizes when someone says “excuse me” before being pushed past in the more crowded places.

Lev is currently leading them through the GUM shopping mall as evening falls. The air outside has stayed chilly all day, with just enough wind to cut through Yaku’s pants and jacket. It makes his ankle and left knee, weary from old volleyball injuries, ache dully. Lev’s excitement has kept him going throughout the day, but now Yaku feels himself flagging, feet pulsing with pain. Lev, the String Bean, has no trouble swishing through swaths of people with his lanky stride. Yaku’s nearly lost sight of him twice since coming here. Normally, keeping track of him isn’t an issue since Lev’s at least a head or two taller than most. But here in the mall filled with other Westerners, Yaku has stopped searching for his mop of silver hair and has taken to scanning the ground for his familiar red tennis shoes.

When he catches up for a third time after losing sight of his companion, Yaku gives up and stretches out an arm to clutch the fabric at the back of Lev’s jacket. The other slows and turns in surprise, then seeing something desperate in his expression, slows his pace a little more before reaching behind and trading his jacket for a hand. Yaku’s too tired to protest, and while he feels ridiculous, like an ornery, sleep-deprived child, he grasps the long fingers tightly and lets himself be led to the next shop.

The mall really is amazing. He’s already seen a bunch of designer names he knows only celebrities wear and so many different specialty and foreign shops. The fluorescent lights make everything with even the smallest shine, glitter and sparkle, whether it’s new stainless steel pots or fine jewelry.

“Think I have enough money to get a new suit?” Lev jokes as they take in a display of men’s clothing that seem to scream money.

“Definitely not.” Yaku assures him. “But I think you look nice enough.”

Lev wiggles his eyebrows and tugs one-handed on his windbreaker collar. Yaku has to hide his smirk into his opposite shoulder. They begin walking at the same time, turning together down a new corridor of stores hand in hand.

After browsing some of the cheaper shops, Lev leads them over to a bench and sets down his backpack, prompting Yaku to finally release his hand. He hadn’t even noticed how warm Lev’s had gotten in his.

“This place is enormous.”

“Yeah.” Yaku agrees and pulls his backpack off as well, rubbing his shoulders.

“Is there anything you especially want to see tomorrow?”

“Well, I think we missed some stuff around the Red Square. And didn’t you want to try to look around Gorky Park?”

“Yeah, we should probably do that tomorrow since we leave the next day.” Lev pulls his bag back on.

“Okay.”

“Oh! And Yaku, I thought of something else we missed today…” Lev continues chattering excitedly about something he wants to add to tomorrow’s itinerary and why it might be important for him to see as a future diplomat, but Yaku hasn’t been able to follow the babbling ever since his hand was pulled back into the warmth of his friend’s fingers.

 

That night, Yaku finds himself lying awake, listening to Lev’s even breathing from the next bed. He’s been exhausted all day and figured that once he crawled under the covers, sleep would inevitably claim him. It seems that was a foolish hope. His mind won’t shut down. Every time he feels like he might be getting close to relaxation, Yaku discovers another worry he hadn’t thought about yet.

_Did he remember to take the metro map out of his back pocket? Did he actually set his alarm? What time did the hotel allow for check-out?_

Each new thought leaves his heart-racing and it takes another ten minutes for him to prioritize the worry, calm his breathing, and find his way back to relaxation. At the moment, he can’t stop thinking about the pain in his ankle. The old high school injury always seems to get worse the colder it gets, and it’s been aching all day. He knows there are some painkillers in his bag and now his mind is fixated on them. Groaning, Yaku finally pushes the covers away and heaves himself out of bed. It’s useless to pretend he’s going to sleep anyway. He waits on the edge of the bed for a moment to see if his eyes will adjust more to the dark room.

Apparently not. He fumbles for his bag on the ground and ends up turning the bathroom light on to see by. After taking the pills with a gulp of stale water from his cup, Yaku returns to turn off the light. Then notices Lev’s silhouette pushing up onto one elbow in the relative darkness.

“Yaku-san, are you okay?”

“Yeah. Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.” Their voices stay hushed in the muffled darkness.

“Can you not sleep?”

Before answering, Yaku flicks off the light and moves back onto his bed. “Yeah, my ankle was kind of acting up, so I took some painkillers.”

“Is that the same ankle you rolled your third year?”

“Yeah. It aches in the cold sometimes. I’ll wear thicker socks tomorrow.”

“Let me know if you want to stop and take more breaks.” Lev’s voice continues in a strained whisper.

“It’s fine, Lev.”

“Okay. Just let me know. I don’t want you to be in pain all day.”

Yaku finds himself flushing, covers drawn up over his chin as though Lev would be able to tell in this darkness. He’s never had anyone fuss over him this much. It’s embarrassing. Usually, he’s the one doing the fussing. “Okay.” He finally rasps.

“What was your favorite thing today?” Lev asks after a moment.

“Probably the metro.”

“Me too.” They both laugh softly. It had been one of the most unexpected parts of their journey, to see all the gorgeous art and architecture down in what you would usually expect to be just another dirty metro station.

He says as much after a while and Lev makes a noise of agreement. Quiet descends and soon Yaku can tell Lev has lapsed back into sleep, his breathing regular and measured. This time Yaku can’t think of any worries to keep him awake, but he clings to consciousness for just a bit longer. If only to hear Lev’s constant breaths from the other bed.

 

Their second day in Moscow requires a lot of walking which Yaku’s not sure his feet will forgive him for anytime soon. But it’s mostly worth it. To see new sites, tombs, statues, and monuments. To see Gorky Park hesitantly giving visitors a peek at the incoming spring. While Lev gushes over the historic sites and political points of the park, Yaku finds himself entranced by a single bud on a tiny skeletal tree. This has been one of the longest winters of his life, and for some reason, standing in front of that little pink and green bud seems really damn significant. Lev gets quite a distance away before realizing he’d stopped. He strolls back slowly, smiling in a confused way until Yaku points out what he’s staring at. When he tries to explain, Lev tries to hide his chuckle with a cough and doesn’t stop smiling in that goofy way of his for at least half an hour.

The park is beautiful. They take too many pictures of one of the elaborate-looking carousels and Lev translates a funny fight between two Russian kids for him that has them both laughing intermittently throughout the day whenever they think about it. There are a lot of statues standing in the slightly deadened spring grass and Lev has to jog over to each one and read the plaques in his broken Russian. A lot of them seem to be from various revolutions and Lev briefly explains the significance of each as they walk. It’s all very interesting, but Yaku’s sure he’ll never remember everything they’ve seen so far.

Being outside so much has brought on the usual aches and pains that come with the cold Russian chill. It’s a fairly nice day with plenty of sun, but the breeze still cuts right through their clothing. Just as Lev requested last night, Yaku tells him to stop every time the pain gets too bad in his ankle or knee, which is embarrassingly often. Especially as they traverse the pathways in the park, Yaku has to stop to roll out his ankle or take pressure off his knee a lot more.

“You know, I could probably carry you for a while,” Lev suggests at one point.

“Don’t you dare.” Yaku glares up at him.

“What’s worse? Piggyback or bridal style?”

“Both!” Yaku growls. “Those are both terrible. If you do end up hauling my lifeless body out of Russia it better be in a Fireman's Carry.”

Lev laughs brightly at the response. “I’ll remember that!”

Yaku does begin to wonder if he will end up half-dead by the end of this trip. Ever since he woke up this morning he’s been battling a dull headache, and as the day goes on the body aches have amplified to a kind of general feeling of sickness. Complete with flashes of hot, chills, a throbbing headache, and tingle at the back of his throat. He’s sure he can attribute most of it to his lack of sleep and his immune system taking a hit for it.

“Morisuke!”

Yaku’s head jerks up at the use of his first name.

Lev’s crouched down near the alleyway of two stone buildings in the midst of downtown Moscow, his jean-clad legs folded neatly, making him look weirdly small and compact. “Yaku, look! A kitty.” In the shadow of the buildings, he spots a pair of golden eyes peering back at them. The cat backs up more at the volume of Lev’s voice. Yaku steps closer until he can place a hand on his shoulder for balance. Every step making him dizzier.

“Cute.” He then addresses the cat, almost completely in shadow at this point. “Hi, pretty kitty.”

Lev, whose eyes have been fixed on the animal all this time looks up to grin at Yaku. “What should we call him?”

“I dunno. How to do you say kitty in Russian?”

“Koshechka.”

“Sounds good to me.”

Lev turns back to the alley and gives a tiny wave. “Bye Koshechka!”

Yaku shakes his head and watches the cat slink behind some boxes. The half-Russian then reaches for the hand on his shoulder and makes to pull himself up with the aid of Yaku’s body weight. Lev gets to his feet but leaves Yaku unbalanced in the process. He falls, hands coming up to catch himself against Lev’s broad chest.

“Ah,” Yaku laughs weakly, pushing himself up. “Sorry, Lev.”

“Oh, sorry!” he apologizes at the same time. “You okay?”

“Yeah, just a little dizzy,” Yaku admits.

A long-fingered hand comes up to rest against his forehead. “You’re kind of hot. Do you think you have a fever?”

Yaku shudders at the touch. “Mmm.. maybe. Been feeling kinda weird all day.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” Lev drops his hand and slides it instead around Yaku’s own.

They’re holding hands again. This time it doesn’t have to do with crowds. _Is Lev trying to comfort him?_

“I don’t want to ruin your trip. I’ll just take some medicine and tea back at the hotel. It’ll be fine.”

“There’s a med-station just over there.” Lev points out. “They might have something.”

“But aren’t you hungry. We’re almost to the restaurant.” He turns to lead them in the direction of it, but Lev yanks hard on his hand.

“Mori! You’re not ruining anything. Let me help you.”

The admonition makes him stop. He glances back at his companion and sees frustration and anger there. It reminds him of how he used to look at practices and during games the first year they met. Annoyed at his own weaknesses, his growing body, his lack of experience. No matter how many times Yaku told him to be patient, always that same look.

“Okay.” he agrees softly.

Lev just nods, face tight, before leading them toward the med-station.

 

Back in their room that night, Yaku takes the over-the-counter cold medicine they got and hopes to some higher power he’ll actually get some sleep. Tomorrow after looking around Moscow a bit more, they plan to travel to a great-uncle of Lev’s in the countryside, which means they’ll be attempting to sleep on a train. Yaku doesn’t even try to delude himself into thinking he’ll get some rest then. This is effectively his last chance.

Lev, who’s lying on the other bed, is immersed in something online and keeps smirking at his phone.     

“What’s so funny?” He finally takes the bait.

Lev’s eyes sparkle with amusement as he looks up at Yaku. “Kuroo commented on my Instagram picture.”

“What’d he say?”

Lev shakes his head. “Something stupid.”

Yaku’s curiosity is piqued, but his own phone is charging in the corner and he’s too lazy to go all the over just to open the app.

“What?” he asks again, lying back on the mattress.

Lev doesn’t answer except to snicker quietly to himself.

Yaku rolls his eyes. Lev is really grating on his nerves tonight. Why keep him in suspense when he’ll just look at the comment later? What’s the harm in just telling him now? Lev probably isn’t even looking at it anymore. He’s moved on to something else and Yaku is left here with his headache, feeling more alone than ever. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, relishing in the darkness for a moment and trying not to get too angry over nothing. He knows the lack of sleep is contributing to his grumpiness.  

“Do you want me to get you some more tea before bed?”

Yaku’s still annoyed, but not enough to turn down the offer. He exhales slowly, eyes still closed and nods. “That’d be great. Thanks, Lev.”

They turn on a game show neither of them fully understand while Yaku sips his tea and breathes in the lemony steam rising off the rim. Lev scrolls through his phone, double-checking tomorrow’s plans.

“Are you excited to meet your uncle?” Yaku asks once his tea has gotten about halfway drunk and isn’t giving off as much steam.

“Yeah.” Lev maneuvers from his position on his stomach to look at Yaku. “His name is Isai. He’s been super helpful with tips on how to prepare and plan the trip. He told my mom how proud he is that I’m taking an interest in her past.”

“That’s nice of him.”

“Yeah. I can’t wait to meet him and talk to him and everything.”     

“You think you’ll be able to understand each other?” Yaku didn’t really mean for that to come out so bluntly, but he’s too tired to correct his rudeness.

Lev just gives him a wide grin, letting Yaku’s negativity fly right over his head. “I hope so. Otherwise, it’s going to be an interesting few days!”

Laughing in a relieved kind of way, Yaku nods. “I guess it’ll be hand gestures for some things.”

“Yup. It’ll work out. No problem.”

Yaku drains the rest of his tea and focuses back on whatever the host of this show is trying to sell the audience on. He’ll never have the same optimistic, care-free attitude Lev does, but maybe he can learn something from it all the same.

     

The drab, scratchy carpet lining their train carriage car is taking some abuse from Yaku’s endless pacing. He really shouldn’t be standing so much with his knee aching the way it has been, but he’s too uncomfortable to sit still. If anything, he feels worse today than he did yesterday. He took more medicine while they took in their last sights of Moscow and then even more cold medicine as they checked out of their hotel in the late afternoon and caught the train out to the country. He shouldn’t be so wrapped up in these symptoms, but all Yaku can think about is the endless pounding of his head, the scratchiness in his throat and the throbbing all over his body. The last thing he needs is another onset of insomnia on top of it all, yet here he is. Awake, despite the fact that he’s completely exhausted.

Lev, on the other hand, is cocooned in his pull-out bed, mysteriously able to fall asleep even with all the rocking of the train carriage and the tiny dimensions of the pull-out. By all laws of science, his lengthy body should not be able to fit so snugly into the tiny, coffin-like box, but Yaku has to say, he looks pretty cozy. Every now and then he lets out a string of garbled, nonsensical sleep-talk.

It’s something Yaku’s gotten used to the past few days. Sometimes he’ll say something back just to hear Lev try to respond in that slow, sleepy nonsense-talk. As he sighs a few new vowels, though, Yaku just feels guilty. His pacing is probably going to wake him up.

He steps out into the narrow hallway and looks around furtively. A train attendant at the end of the hall by the bathroom looks up at his appearance. Though he has on a nicer pair of pajamas, Yaku still feels weirdly exposed wearing them in the semi-public of the train. He walks toward her and notices the tea station on the left. He smiles slowly in acknowledgment before pouring the water. She seems to understand intuitively that he doesn't speak Russian and just gestures to a basket of sweeteners once he’s finished. He takes the tea back to his room, not sure where else he can go to pace off his insomnia.

Their compartment is dark and just a bit stuffy. Yaku would open a window if he weren’t afraid it might wake up Lev. There is just enough light from the electronic appliances and from the glowing door frame to make things visible. He takes the tea bag by the string and twirls it through the steaming water, watching the flavors steep down to the bottom. Pulling the bedcovers up, he turns to watch the view from outside the window. City lights giving way to swatches of darkness that seem to get darker before the next town lights up his vision again. Lev snuffles from his place on the cot and then sighs long and slow.

Just the sound of his sigh seems to press against Yaku’s sternum in the darkness. Making his chest ache in the loneliest and acutely painful way. His head feels heavy and sluggish, and suddenly he has the sensation within his sinuses and throat that he’s going to start crying. Before he can, Yaku pulls himself out of bed and into his slippers.

Before he knows what he’s doing, Yaku’s tottering down the shaking hallway into the mostly deserted dining car. There’s a couple in a corner, the man immersed in a paperback and the woman has a paper cup of tea that matches Yaku’s own, robe clutched in one hand just below her neck. He finds a seat at an empty booth and sets his cup down. The rustling of book pages and the creaking of the train car are the only sounds breaking up the eerie silence. He watches the transparent tea bag sink to the bottom of his cup and swallows unshed tears. For the rest of the night, he counts the clusters of lights the train passes and closes his eyes during long stretches of dark country fields.  

 

Almost immediately after exiting the train, Yaku can make out one incredibly loud voice among all the other noise on the platform.

“Riefu!”

He jolts and turns to see a large, bearded man walking swiftly toward the two of them. His long black coat swishes around his ankles and thick boots collide heavily with the concrete, leaving water marks of the soles beneath. Yaku had nearly forgotten Lev’s real name and it takes him a moment to recognize it in a thick Russian accent.

“Dyadya!” Lev waves cheerfully at the stranger and grabs Yaku’s hand, pulling him toward the end of the platform. They barely get a few steps before Lev is swept into an awkward one-armed hug. Yaku’s nearly sucked in too, his hand still tucked in Lev’s. There’s a rush of Russian garbling that mostly goes over Yaku’s head as Lev and his uncle meet and introduce themselves for the first time.

He decides quickly there is very little resemblance between them. Of course, being a great-uncle, he is removed by a few bloodlines already, but Lev seems to have gotten more of his father’s Japanese looks than Yaku first realized. They are both about the same height and have the same angular look about them but his uncle’s face is lined with wrinkles and has a hard, dark tan to it, his eyes are a deep-set grey instead of green, and his expressions seem a bit more closed off than Lev’s open, easy face. There is also something distinctly Russian about they way Isai looks and carries himself that Yaku can’t quite articulate.

After they separate, Lev’s great-uncle blinks down at him and nods awkwardly. Luckily, not many people are getting on or off of this particular stop and it’s pretty early in the morning, so no one else has to witness this weird, mostly-silent introduction. Lev jumps in with some hasty translations and they quietly shake hands. Isai’s hard face suddenly breaks into a smile and Yaku is struck by a likeness he hadn’t seen before. Later, when he manages a couple Russian expressions of gratitude while loading the car, it makes the stern break into the same huge grin again.

The trip to the house is just as quiet as their handshake. Lev sits in the passenger seat and every so often begins chattering in accented, slow Russian while Yaku tries not to watch the road from the backseat. He is still getting used to right-side traffic and Isai seems to hug the sides of the streets. Every time he closes his eyes, however, the thudding in his skull gets more pronounced, so he compromises by focusing instead on the seat in front of him.

By the time they get to Isai’s small country house, Yaku can hardly see straight and his head is positively throbbing. He manages to pull himself up and out of the car then leans against it, letting cool air wash over him. The small house they’ve arrived at is overrun with vines. Some kind of aggressive Ivy, and long grasses that would probably reach Yaku’s knees. The front flower bed looks more tended to. Soft spring dirt appears freshly turned, and hints of tiny bulbs are just poking out. Maybe because of the wildness of the weeds that surround it, but the house looks tiny. The small windows revealing very little of the interior, only the backs of chairs or curtains.

Yaku braces himself against the hard metal of the vehicle but still feels like his head is spinning. There’s a high-pitched ringing in his ears and his vision has begun to blur around the edges. He can hear Lev’s voice as if from a great distance, saying something in Russian and then Japanese as he exits the car, but Yaku can hardly parse it out from the loud ringing and his own internal commands of, “ _Don’t pass out. Don’t pass out._ ” The last thing he hears is Lev’s panicked shout of “Mori!” before he hits the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading! And especially for encouraging me and offering advice. I really appreciate it.
> 
> I'm still pretty confident I'll have the next chapter wrapped up sometime next month, but things have gotten busier so we'll see. Thanks for your patience! 
> 
> Also, sorry about the mild cliffhanger. I debated for a long time about leaving it like this... so don't hate me?


	4. Unexpected Detours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last leg of the journey has Yaku and Lev facing unknown paths.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who read and liked this story! You keep me going. I'm happy I stayed on schedule, but it did take longer than expected to wade through all the junky writings I've had in storage for a while. I hope it makes sense as a complete story now:)
> 
> I've added some Russian and a couple translations in this chapter. If I've grossly mistranslated something, or the links don't work, let me know.
> 
> Update: I think those links I tried to include are dumb. So sorry about that. I'll see what I can do, in the meantime I guess you'll have to treat them like regular footnotes and scroll to find the translations:/

Yaku wakes with his face pressed up against a musty comforter, the fabric creasing beneath his cheek and scratching his face. Groaning, he rolls onto his back and pushes a hand through his hair. The light streaming in must have been what roused him, signaling it to be about noon. He pushes up into a sitting position and looks around.

The double bed he’s been lying on top of takes up most the floor space in the room, with an old, peeling wardrobe in a corner. The view from the window across from him doesn’t reveal much except branches from a nearby bush and cloudy, gray sky. The whole place has a distinctly old, stale smell about it. His mouth tastes just as horrible, in that stale, gummy way it gets after a long nap and his head still hurts, though the pounding is down to a minimum. Now the feeling of embarrassment pervades everything else. _He actually passed out?_ Probably just like the women in old movies who twist dramatically as they collapse into someone’s arms. Except he landed in dirt. Yaku only has to look down at the side of his jeans to confirm this fact with the streak of dried mud that now decorates his leg.

The door to his left hesitantly creaks open and Lev emerges, pushing his way into the room carefully.      

“Yaku-san! You woke up. Do you feel okay?” He’s carrying a bowl of something steaming and a glass of water. While he busies himself with placing them carefully on the side table, Yaku takes his time answering.

“Yeah. How long was I out?”

“Well, you woke up a little bit when I carried you in, but then you fell asleep when I laid you down. Dyadya said I should leave you alone.” He shakes himself a bit and blinks. His eyes are ringed red. “I think you were asleep for about two hours. It’s just after noon.” He pulls the table toward the bed. “We made some soup for lunch. And I have anti-fever pills you can take.”

The steaming soup smells like something akin to chicken-noodle, and although Yaku knows he’s hungry, it makes him feel slightly nauseous.

“Maybe I’ll try and eat some later.”

“Okay.” Lev pushes the table back and Yaku breathes a little sigh of relief.

“Thanks. Sorry if I scared you guys.”

He lets out a shaky laugh and sits beside him on the bed. “I’m just glad you got some sleep.”

“Me too.” Yaku smiles weakly. “I probably really needed that.”

“Mori,” Lev glances at him quickly “Is it okay if I call you that?”

“Of course. I don’t mind.”

“Cool. Um. Mori, I think you should go see a doctor.”  

Yaku gulps.

“A real doctor. I’m sure Dyadya can take us somewhere.”

“Lev. I don’t want to inconvenience everyone. I’m sure I just need some more sleep and some cold medicine.”

“But you have a fever!” He pushes a hand onto Yaku’s sweaty forehead as if to confirm for himself.  The palm against his face is larger than expected and shaking slightly. “I’m the one who made you sick! We should go see what they say.”

“Lev.” He pulls the hand down from his face and curls his own fingers around long, spindly ones. “You didn’t do anything wrong, okay? I made myself sick. I just stressed out too much. You don’t have to take care of me.”

Lev gives him a pleading look. “I still think you should see a doctor. Just in case.”

“Fine.” Yaku huffs. “If it’ll make you feel better.”

“It will.” Suddenly Lev leans in, closer than Yaku knows how to react to, and plants a kiss to his forehead. “I want to take care of you.”

His heart stutters in his chest and looks up into sincere green eyes. “Fine.”

 

Isai leads the three of them into the waiting room of a small clinic the next day. It’s nestled in the center of town between thick-stoned buildings. Most of the main city center is clustered tightly together like this, with houses getting larger and further apart the farther they are from town. Yaku can’t quite decide if he prefers rural Russia to urban, but this city seems to have a great mix of both. Inside, the waiting room looks much the same as it would anywhere, the modern interior strangely incongruent with the ancient exterior.

Lev and his uncle sit on plastic chairs off to Yaku’s left, huddled close and talking in Russian. Yaku’s comprehension has definitely improved, but he often loses the main themes of conversations. Right now he’s fairly sure they’re discussing the doctor they’re about to see. He’s glad the two of them have gotten along well so far. Lev and Isai spent most of the morning pouring over old photographs of the family, pointing out Lev’s mother in each. Yaku joined them for a while, listening to the new language and smiling whenever he spotted the younger-looking Alisa in dated 80’s outfits before Isai pointed her out.

A nurse arrives and calls out something Yaku doesn’t quite understand. He only clues in when Lev and Isai pop out of their chairs. Lev extends a hand and gives him a smile before helping him up. It makes him want to puke.

Ever since he’s agreed to get checked out, he’s been treated like a delicate piece of porcelain. A tiny teacup that could crumble at the slightest disturbance. The whole thing is making him crazy. Especially the pitiful smiles he gets from Lev. He wants to smack them right off his face. _He’s not dying for God’s sake._ Last night he even managed to catch a decent amount of sleep and the fever’s gone down. This whole appointment will probably end up being a waste of time.

They’re led into a cramped examination room. There aren’t enough chairs to seat everyone so Yaku climbs onto the exam table, crushing the sanitary paper noisily, legs dangling off the end. Isai speaks quickly with the nurse, gesturing all the time to Yaku. He recognizes the word “Japanese” as the language barrier is explained. The nurse simply makes some affirmative noises and enters some things into the computer before making an exit.

By the time the doctor comes in, Lev has begun pronouncing the names of nearby medical supplies in a terrible Japanese accent. Yaku’s face is twitching with the effort not to laugh at all Isai’s winces. They quiet down immediately once the door shuts, however. The doctor is a tall, rather severe-looking woman with dark auburn hair twisted at the back of her head. Papers in hand, she strides to the desk and opens the file on the computer, probably reviewing the nurse’s notes before turning to address Yaku.

"Vy yaponskiy, pravil’no?” 1

He doesn’t know how to react to her blank stare but understands the word “Japanese” again, so he makes a nod while Lev shouts out an affirmative. Then she turns to address the room at large.

The next few minutes consist of the doctor’s clipped questions and a confusing round of translation between Yaku and Lev. They list his symptoms first in Japanese, then Russian and answer questions about them once translated back. Lev, doing most of the heavy lifting during the back and forth, bolts out of his chair at one point and paces while searching for the correct words. Isai and the doctor fill in the blanks when he reaches pockets of missing vocabulary. Near the end of her questioning, Lev ends up standing next to Yaku and gives him a sort of hopeless shrug of apology while Isai and the doctor continue talking.

“Otlichno srabotano, Lev.” 2 Yaku mumbles the compliment, leaning his head close to the other’s shoulder so his hideous attempt at Russian won’t be heard by the native speakers. He knows the younger must be feeling down about his translating ability, but wants to show some kind of gratitude all the same.

Lev turns to shine a 100-watt smile on him. It’s a little hard to look at, in a completely different way from the pitying smiles. Yaku rolls his forehead onto the other’s bony shoulder to protect himself from it, but that only encourages Lev to pat the side of his face consolingly. Yaku lets him. Nothing could feel as ridiculous than simply being in this situation anyway.

The doctor advances toward them and Lev steps back to give her some room, dislodging Yaku’s head sharply. First, she uses her gloved hands to tilt his chin and peer into his eyes, her gaze focusing tight. Then she takes his temperature and does a few other general physical check-ups, all the while asking questions about his sleeping patterns which Lev helps translate the answers to. She scribbles a few more notes then address Lev and Isai in a lower, graver tone. This must be the diagnosis.

Yaku looks questioningly at them all from his seat on the table.

“She says you have exhaustion.” Lev looks a little nonplussed as he tells him.

He feels his eyes narrow. “Exhaustion? Is that even an illness? I thought it was made up for hysterical Victorian women.”

But Lev’s attention has drifted back to his uncle and the doctor who are now discussing something else. Without looking away he adds, “I think she said the underlying thing might be a sleep disorder, but that the exhaustion caused your fever and dizziness.” Yaku watches as his brow furrows, trying to internally translate something else from their conversation. “I think she’s prescribing some medicine.”

Yaku sits back and nods, mostly to himself. It does make sense in a way. Hopefully whatever she gives him will get him to sleep at a decent hour.

They leave with Yaku getting one last pat on the shoulder from the doctor. She provides a bottle of sleeping pills and a recommendation to rest until his fever is down completely.

Back at the house, Yaku gets out a Thank You to Isai and Lev, hoping he didn’t disappoint his friend with his pronunciation.  

“If you want to go in and sleep, Dyadya said he would take me around town and to see some other relatives,” Lev tells him.

Gripping his pill bottle Yaku nods. “Okay. Come wake me up whenever you want to do something later.”

“Yeah! I think we’ll go out to dinner with everyone.”

He smiles. “Okay. Thank you again, Lev.”

“Of course,”

They stare at each other for what Yaku realizes is probably a little too long after Isai clears his throat from behind them.

“Have a good nap!” Lev chirps.

Yaku nods and watches the two of them leave. He doesn’t shut the door until the car is completely out of sight.  

 

“Yaku, can I try something?” Lev looks at him uncertainly from the doorway. “To help you sleep.”

They’re back in Isai’s guest room after dinner. The evening was passed pleasantly in a local pub, talking and eating with Isai, another aunt, and some distant cousins from Mrs. Habia’s mother’s side of the family. The food was some of the most traditional Yaku’s tried since coming here. Cabbage wrapped meat, swimming in tomato-y sauces, pickled vegetables, lots of sour cream, and bread. It was a dinner he’ll never forget. Able to observe and listen as Lev interacted with some of his distant relatives, letting the language, atmosphere, and food submerge him into a completely new world.

“I can just take the pills.” He holds up the bottle and rattles it for emphasis.

Lev somehow changed into his pajamas at the speed of light right when they got back and has caught Yaku shirtless, still searching for his own. He finally finds the familiar fabric and yanks it over his head, feeling exposed.

“Yeah, but. I just thought this might be… a little more…” Lev shrugs as he trails off. “Alisa does it for me when I’m sick.”

Keeping a thin hold of his patience, Yaku makes an effort to think logically. As much as he wants to be alone, Lev is just trying to be nice. And although the newly-diagnosed Exhaustion is making him unbelievably tired, he just has to put up with whatever Lev wants to try for a few minutes. “Sure.” He agrees.

“Lie down. Um… On your stomach.” Lev decides, directing him toward the bed as he turns out the light. The side table lamp clicks on and fills the room with a comfortable, yellow glow. Yaku does as he’s told, folding his arms under the pillow and turning his head away from the side of the bed Lev claims. “Maybe, take your sleeping pill. Then it can help, and… um…” Lev gestures uselessly while Yaku does just that.

“It’s fine.” He says after swallowing. “I really appreciate you helping me with all this anyway, and if you think relaxing me will help… Well, I trust you.”

Lev brightens at the words. “It always helps me. Alisa’s really good at it, but I’ve only tried doing it for someone else a few times.”

 _Doing what?_ Yaku can’t help thinking as he lies down again, leaving the back of his head toward his friend. It an intensely vulnerable feeling. Lev hasn’t even said what he’s going to try. Does it involve touching him? Singing? White noise? Before his thoughts start racing out of his head he feels the mattress dip where Lev leans in, close to his torso.

“I’m just going to whisper and talk softly. If that’s ok?” his voice is almost completely gone, a feather-light tickle in Yaku’s ears.

“I didn’t know you _could_ whisper!” He exclaims in mock surprise. A soft cuff from a large hand comes against the back of his head.

“Shh! You don’t get to talk.” After the reprimand, his voice returns to a softer, soothing kind of speech. “You have to be very quiet Yaku-san. I am going to talk a little bit, though. Whisper to you, if that’s okay.”

Yaku can feel himself tensing all over at the awkwardness of the situation and makes a conscious effort to relax on his next exhale.

“Good job! You relaxed on your own.” Lev’s whispered praise is a bit closer to his head this time. “Yaku, I’m going to touch your back, ok?”

Worried he’ll be scolded for talking again, he merely makes an affirmative sound in the back of his throat.

Lev’s hands start up a gentle, warm pressure on the blades of his shoulders. Long fingers trail softly over his shirt, making the fabric emit little shushing noises. All the while, he continues to chatter in a muted tone next to Yaku’s head.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Yaku’s not sure if he should be responding, but decides to just stay silent, focusing on the tickling against his back. “Alisa has such a nice whisper. I love it when she speaks close to my ear.” Yaku takes another breath and tries to relax further. “You don’t have to pay attention to what I say. A lot of times, Alisa would just talk nonsense. Or whisper people’s names over and over. Sometimes she says the Russian she knows. Mne nravitsya govorit’ s vami.” 3

He lets the strange, clipped sounds of Russian wash over him, focusing on the barely-there sensation of Lev’s fingers that send waves of tingles up his spine. There’s an occasional break with tickling to smooth a palm down his back and he relishes the feeling of the warmth and soft changing movements.

A voice in the back of his head tells him it shouldn’t be this easy to trust anyone like this. It feels too intimate, too real. But Lev in a weird way has always been easy to trust. Maybe because of his own unwavering honesty and innocence. Or maybe just because of his constancy in Yaku’s life.

The whispers in Russian have changed as well, and he can parse out English, Japanese, even an odd French phrase or two. Something Lev murmurs in English sounds a lot like, “I love you.” And Yaku’s tingles turn into frantic butterflies. It’s a common enough phrase, seen on T-shirts and mugs around every corner in Tokyo and Moscow, and maybe it’s a meaningless mantra, but it has his heart hammering. Yaku’s parents have never been big with displays of affection, but they share the quirk of saying “I love you” in almost every language when feeling especially sentimental. He has most of them memorized as a result.

The next murmur comes increasingly close to his left ear, and he can hear every catch of tongue against Lev’s teeth and the roof of his mouth.

“You tensed up, Mori. Ne khorosho .” 4

Long fingers bury themselves in his short hair and he makes some kind of gurgle in surprise.

Lev hushes him again. “Shhh… Relax. Vy delayete tak khorosho.” 5

Yaku takes a long breath and tries to sink back into the touch. Tingles start around his scalp as Lev slides his fingers slowly up through his hair. He is still whispering his slow, strange Russian so Yaku focuses on the clicking of his lips and tongue, letting his eyes close. The sleep medication must be starting to work because his body feels like a huge weight and opening his eyes seems like a chore. Lev’s tickling and soft whispering have effectively turned his brain to mush.

It seems like just a few minutes, or maybe half an hour has gone by, but Yaku can feel his brain edging toward unconsciousness. Sometime during the head scratching Lev must have switched back to Japanese. He’s repeating something that sounds like, “so much”. It’s the last thing Yaku hears before he falls asleep.

 

The next morning Yaku wakes slowly, registering first that everything is warm; uncomfortably so. He feels slightly sweaty and after shifting around realizes his shirt is sticking to his back. The reason why becomes evident when the bunch of blankets he’s been clutching groans. Lev’s sleeping form is huddled in his embrace, soft gray hair poking out onto the pillow, the rest of him tucked neatly in the comforter. Yaku removes his arm from where it's gotten trapped under the other’s waist. Pushing back, he manages to tug the duvet cover off the other side of the mattress and lets fresh air wash over him.

 _Lev fell asleep with him?_ It’s surprising but not a total shock. They were both tired last night and with those sleeping pills, Yaku was basically dead to the world. He rubs at his sleep-encrusted eyes and wipes a hand down his face, staring at the ceiling and taking stock of everything. He feels a lot better rested than he has in weeks. By the light coming in through the curtains he estimates it must be about mid-morning, maybe nine or nine-thirty. One solid night of sleep down.

Soft noises start up from the other side of the bed and Yaku watches with interest as Lev pats around his middle before turning with a look of betrayal once he realizes the extra bed-heater isn’t curled around his back. Luckily, his brain seems to catch up to the situation after a moment. More covers get pushed off and he gives Yaku a sleepy smile while stretching his long legs off the end of the mattress.

“Hey, Mori-san.”

“Morning.”

“How did you sleep?”

“So good.” Yaku can’t hold back the smile that suddenly overtakes his face. He looks back up at the ceiling so he won’t have to face Lev with it.

“You slept a long time yesterday, hmm?”

“Yeah.”

Lev snuggles next to him, despite the lingering warmth of the bed, and pokes his cheek with one finger. “Feel better?”

“Yeah.” He releases a huge contented sigh, then wrinkles his nose when Lev starts tracing a line down his arm.

“Is it weird I fell asleep next to you?”

That makes him laugh. “Maybe a little, but I don’t mind. It was pretty late when we got back last night. I bet you were tired.”

“I was. I basically put myself to sleep.”

“You’re good at it. Relaxing people.” Yaku darts a look at the arm that still has Lev’s fingers dancing down it.

“Alisa’s better at it.”

“Nah.” His dismissal is quick, despite not having any firsthand experience. “Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn’t make the whole day a drag.”

Lev looks up at him, a childish, hopeful gleam in his eyes. “Definitely not. I’m just glad you got some rest.”

“Me too.” Yaku has to hold himself back from returning the forehead kiss from the other day. Something tells him it’s okay for Lev to touch him, but not the other way around. The younger player has always been boundary-less. It might mean something different if Yaku initiated a touch other than his usual hair-ruffling. He sits up, displacing Lev’s hand, and throws off the covers, letting the cold stale air of the room embrace him instead.

“Ready to finish up this trip?” Yaku thinks he catches a brief look of loss come over Lev’s face before he flashes a grin at the question.

“Let’s do it!”

 

After a warm goodbye between Lev and his great-uncle at the train station, they are on their way toward the last stop on the trip. Although they haven’t been specifically invited, Lev wants to go to the town where his mother grew up. Mrs. Haiba’s father died a few years ago, but her mother still lives there. Yaku’s gotten the impression that she doesn’t have much to do with her Russian family. From the stories, it seems she was a bit of a free spirit in earlier years, drifting from town to town, obsessed with trying new things. She moved away from home as soon as she could, and lived most of her teen years with Isai and other relatives before emigrating to Japan. Lev hasn’t even tried contacting his maternal grandmother yet, apparently satisfied to simply look around the town. There’s probably a lot Yaku’s not being told about her past, but he also doesn’t want to stick his nose where he shouldn’t. They’ll only stay there the night anyway, moving on in the morning.

Sitting on a train during the day is already preferable to the night experience. Especially since he has a conscious Lev to talk to. Although, he seems distracted today. It reminds Yaku of their first few official volleyball matches when he would work himself into a hyperactive, clumsy mess during the bus rides. Now that he’s older, that excess energy seems to have translated into twitchy habits like shaking his foot incessantly, drumming his fingers on the plastic table top between them, and chattering even louder than usual. In the muffled quiet of the train car, his voice carries. Yaku feels self-conscious. They’ll probably be leaving a bunch of disgruntled passengers behind when they finally leave the car free of protrusive Japanese conversation.

“Hey, idiot!” Yaku interrupts the most recent rambling, accompanied by a flick to the forehead; a move that requires he leans over the table, propped up on one knee. _Stupid, short legs._

“What was that for?” Lev rubs where his head was abused.

“You’re making me crazy.”

“Huh? Yaku-san!” Lev looks dismayed. “What did I do?”

“You’re so…” he motions vaguely, “Jittery. I don’t know. Quit bouncing.”

Lev stops twitching and instead clasps his hands together in some kind of prayer, head bowed in repentance.

Releasing a huge sigh, Yaku pushes out of the bench and scoots onto the seat next to Lev. “What’s bothering you?” He says it lower, in more of a whisper.

His companion doesn’t answer for a while and Yaku sits back, listening to the muted talking around them, the rattling of the train wheels, and the whooshing of air outside the window.

“I think Dyadya was upset I didn’t speak Russian very well.” He says it so softly, Yaku almost misses it.

“What gave you that idea? Did he say something?”

“No. I just…” he shrugs. “I just suck at it.”

“You don’t suck. It just takes time, and you didn’t start learning it until just a few years ago,”

“I know.” Lev looks forlornly ahead at the empty booth before them.

Yaku’s at a loss. Comforting others has never been one of his strong suits. “Well, I don’t think he was disappointed. If anything, he seemed really impressed at how much of an effort you made, learning the language, coming all the way here, translating for me. I mean, that’s how it seemed to me. And I’m really proud of you.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course,” he gulps, “You’re incredible. And I think your whole family’s really proud of you too.”

“My mom didn’t want me to come.” Lev’s voice sounds scratchy. “She said it was fine if I did, but Russia just brought back sad memories for her. Maybe we should get off somewhere else and explore another town.”

“But you want to at least see her hometown, right? See where she grew up, have a picture of what it’s like in your mind?”

Lev looks up from his hands and gazes at the empty seat in front of them again. “Yeah. I guess so.”

Yaku observes his profile. He doesn’t like the way his eyebrows are drawn up so high or the way his long form is hunched over the table top. “Then let’s go. We don’t have to stay overnight if you don’t want to.”

Finally, Lev turns to look at him. His eyes are distant, but he gives a sort of half-smile.

“C’mere.” Yaku opens his arms in invitation and Lev sinks into the hug. He is a lot heavier than expected, but Yaku manages to hold onto the broad shoulders and pats his hair, letting the silky strands slip through his fingers. “Don’t worry.” He finds himself murmuring. Lev buries his face in his jacket for a moment before surfacing.

“Hey Yaku-san,” Lev shifts so he’s not totally smothering him, back pressed against the booth. “Do you remember the first time you saw me?”

“Yeah, at Volleyball tryouts? I remember thinking you were too tall to be real.”

“What?” he squawks.

Yaku grins wickedly. “That was _my_ first impression.”

Lev reaches out and slides a thumb down the scar that’s become visible in his smile. It’s not the first time since the airport he’s been drawn to the twist around his mouth. Now it’s like an unconscious habit to try and touch it whenever Yaku smiles. “That wasn’t the first time I saw you, you know.”

“Really?”

“Mmm…” Fingers curl softly around his chin as Lev watches the scar disappear. “You and Kuroo were recruiting with the other clubs at the beginning of my first year.” His hand trickles down his chest slowly and settles on the seat next to Yaku’s own. “There were two jerks from my class who came to ask you guys about it. I hated those kids. They made fun of me for being tall and liked to tease some of the other girls in our class.” He heaves a sigh, “Anyway, they were being really rude and sarcastic, asking dumb questions like how many confessions they could expect after joining the team or whatever.”

The situation he describes sounds incredibly familiar, and yet so mundane Yaku has no specific memory to tie it to.

“Kuroo was annoyed, but he was still answering their questions.” Lev’s stare has shifted into space again and as he watches his profile, the green of his eyes seems to deepen. “Then they asked something like, how you were able to join because you’re so short.”

Yaku feels a reflexive twitch in his shoulder at that.

“I thought you were going to bite one of them. You said if they really wanted to join they’d get to see why you had a starting position, and you’d make sure neither of them got one.” Lev laughs happily. “You were so cool. They practically ran away. After that, I knew I wanted to join the volleyball team no matter what.”

“Lev. What the heck?”

“It’s true!”

“You were impressed I snapped at some jerks in your class?”

“Well, when you say it like that…”

“It sounds really lame?” Yaku finishes for him.

“I was a First Year! You looked so tiny but you scared the biggest bullies I knew.” Lev shrugs. “It was a big deal for me.”

Yaku can feel a blush starting at the back of his neck, crawling up around his ears. “You are so weird!”

Lev just giggles and slouches lower in order to lie his head on his shoulder. “I’m so glad I met you, Yaku-san!”

Yaku gets the same overwhelming urge from his morning to kiss the crown of his head for that stupid, embarrassing, grossly-sweet comment, but all he manages is a snort and a small hair-ruffle. Maybe some other time he promises himself.

 

The town they arrive in is small, dirty, and a little more urban in its appearance. Yaku is forced to jog between steps to keep up with Lev’s stride as they leave the platform. He was smart enough to stash their suitcases and bags at the train station’s lockers, but without being weighed down, the taller of them seems to get faster.

The buildings gradually get more upscale the further they get from the station. This city seems a lot livelier than Isai’s rural location, or maybe it’s just the time of day. The threat of rain is imminent in the brooding clouds above them, but despite that, people mill around shops, walk in clumps through changing streetlights, and huddle in groups around open doorways. The crowds make him dizzy. Something about the moving masses of people causing his exhaustion-addled brain swim.  

This morning he felt well-rested, but now that it’s later in the day Yaku catches the familiar feeling of drained grogginess he’s been experiencing for a while. It makes him easily distracted. More than once he finds himself getting caught up in observing the people around him. Watching customers exchanging money, brush past one another in lines, jogging to beat a stoplight. At one point, Yaku realizes he’s lost sight of his guide. He scans the street quickly for a tower of gray hair but is disappointed to find no one resembling the long-limbed idiot. He tries to catch a glimmer of red sneaker through the blockade of shoes before him, but can’t see anything past neutral tones of leather.

 _Crap._ He’s really lost. Lev was the one with the map, both in his head and hands. Yaku was just along for the ride. Trying to think quickly, he makes his way toward the steps of an official looking building and presses back against the wall, away from the swirl of people. He should stay put. That’s what you do when you’re lost. Of course, in the corner of this building, there’s no way anyone will see him. He darts around his hiding place and climbs to the top of the steps. From here he’ll have a better view. At the top, he can see more of the street. The early-market rush is still going on, but this time Yaku doesn’t distract himself with the strangers. Instead, he hones in on anyone who looks familiar. After about a minute, he finally sees a head he knows well, whipping back and forth in confusion. _Bingo._

Jumping down from his perch, Yaku runs down the street, ducking through arms and around bags and purses until he reaches his target. Without thinking, he crashes into Lev from behind, squeezing him around the middle.

“Lyovochka!” there’s a reprimand in there somewhere, but Yaku’s also laughing breathlessly, completely ruining his intention. “Curse your long legs!”

“Mori-san! I thought you got kidnapped or something!” Lev turns awkwardly in the embrace, face awash in relief.

“You’re such an idiot.” he punches his side lightly. They start off again, this time with Yaku claiming one long arm by wrapping it with both of his. “Gotta keep you next to me.” He explains while Lev nods cheerfully.

 

Lev has pinpointed the places he wants to see and they spend most of the morning and early afternoon wandering around town, checking out some (admittedly) unremarkable sites. There’s a small park where he says his mother played as a child, a bridge he recognizes from her old photos, and the cemetery where they pick out some of his forbears’ headstones. Lev seems excited to see everything he recognizes from photograph or description, if maybe a little melancholy.

Yaku’s gotten too used to the younger’s infectious laughter, fast bi-lingual babbling, and the quick snapping of his phone’s photo shutter noise. This more subdued Lev is slightly unnerving. He tries to keep an upbeat attitude by pointing out interesting markers, building, birds, and photo opportunities. He’s not sure if it’s working all that well, though. The clouds that have been gathering all afternoon seem to hang even heavier and more ominous as time goes on. Finally, as they peruse the last hill in the graveyard the first thick raindrops begin to fall. They rush to the top of the grassy slope and take cover under a small mausoleum’s overhanging roof.

“Should we go in the church?” Yaku suggests, looking over the hundreds of double crossed spikes to where the biggest Orthodox cross rises into the dark sky.

“Sure.”

Inside the stone walls, the church feels almost colder than the air outside. An elderly-looking priest nods at them. They pass the flickering collection of candles and bulletin boards and Lev leads them up into one of the alcoves on the side of the room. The glass case inside hold a number of objects, mostly books with plaques next to each item. The priest meanders over and welcomes them. He gestures to the case and says something else.

“Woah!” Lev leans so his nose nearly rubs against the glass. “This bible is one of the oldest written in Cyrillic.” Yaku watches him mouth the faded words on the page soundlessly. A little half-smile creeps onto his face. He can feel where the scar makes it twist.

“What’s this one?” He asks, pointing out another crumbling book. Lev’s open windbreaker falls over Yaku's back with a faint rustling noise as he moves to get a better look. He can feel the warmth radiating from his torso and can smell the familiar spicy cologne, dimmed with the must of rain and church-provided incense.

“It’s an old kid’s book. For teaching bible stories. Look, there are some illustrations from it.” Lev pulls back to survey the separated pages and Yaku’s back is exposed again to the drafty church air.

They stroll around the entire outer edge of the building, taking in all the ornate decorations, paintings, dark stained-glass windows. The priest talks with Lev intermittently, telling them about the history of the church and the town. After about ten minutes the rain outside has only gotten thicker and faster. Yaku stares through one of the windows, watching water slide down it, blurring the view of the cemetery outside. He takes hold of one of his companion’s hands once the priest has turned away and whispers quietly, “What should we do?”

Lev makes a face and shrugs.

“We could go back to the station and see if there’s a train leaving today.”

They both turn and watch streaks of water dribble down the panes of glass outside. Suddenly Yaku’s fingers are squeezed and he raises and eyebrow at Lev’s determined expression. “Let’s just stay here. Find a hotel or something. We’ll be drenched by the time we get back to the station anyway.”

“Yeah.”

“We’ll go back and get our bags later.”

Yaku nods. “That sounds warmer.”  

Lev laughs and together they push through the thick doors out into the storm.

 

They find a Travelodge a few blocks away. It was a shorter walk than going to the station, but Yaku still ends up drenched. His hair plastered to his forehead and his jeans heavy with water. Lev fared a little better in his windbreaker, but now the hood on it looks like crumpled piece of plastic glued to his head.

“Who’s first to shower?” Lev dumps his jacket on the floor as soon as he walks into the room.

Tutting, Yaku reaches to pick it up and finds a hanger for it in the closet.

“Oh, so this is what a Family Suite meant.”

Yaku pokes his head out of the closet, feeling more than a little concerned at the tone of voice. “What?” He rips off his own wrinkled jacket and hangs it up before returning to the main room, which at first had been hidden by the narrow hall. There are two beds as promised, but he has to rub at his eyes to make sure his vision isn’t off. One bed is enormous, obviously king-sized while the second is tiny, laughably small in its proportions. The only thing that could fit inside would have to be a very small child or a very big dog. “What?” he repeats.

“I’m sorry Mori!” Lev wails. “That guy was talking so fast and I thought Family Suite meant bigger beds.”

Yaku sighs, “I guess they meant just one bed is bigger.”

Lev winces.

“It’s fine. We’ll figure it out later. You going to shower?”

“Yes!” Lev rushes to the bathroom.

Yaku finds a robe to trade for his wet clothing and amuses himself with incomprehensible Russian TV for a while. Lev emerges after a few more minutes, accompanied by a cloud of steam. His hair is damp and sticking to his face which is pink with heat from the shower. He only has a towel wrapped around his waist and is carrying a bundle of wet clothes in his arms.

“Where’d you hang yours?”

Yaku blinks. He’d forgotten how lanky his friend is. He has the same twiggy body from high school, but now there’s a nice padding of muscle to his chest. He finds it extremely bewildering. In answer, he points toward the heater near the window then pushes off the huge mattress in a kind of trance. “Gonna shower.”

“Okay!”

The hot water is definitely welcome after being wet and cold for so long, but Yaku also feels like it’s going to his head. He feels weird, dizzy, flushed, even. Maybe his fever is ratcheting up again. He spends a bit longer than necessary standing under the hot spray letting his mind wander. For some reason, he keeps replaying stupid, insignificant things that have happened throughout the day in his head. Like when they were on the train and Lev ran his finger down the side of his mouth for the thousandth time, or when they held hands in the church. When Lev pretended not to be tearing up when he saw some of his long-lost family headstones, or when they talked about seeing each other for the first time.

Taking a huge breath, Yaku steadies himself against the shower wall. It all seems vaguely… romantic, in a sense. Of course, he’s never had a friendship quite like the one he shares with Lev. Their relationship is different. But trying to think of a concrete reason why that might be leaves Yaku at a loss. He feels crazy. _Does he like Lev?_ The question makes him feel slightly panicked, out of breath, small.

He dries off quickly and finds his way back into his robe. Lev is lounging on the king-sized bed in similar hotel-provided attire, watching TV with the sound muted. Yaku hesitates between the bathroom and the rest of the room. For some reason the situation makes him feel like he’s on the edge of a precipice. When Lev smiles and pats the spot on the bed next to him, some of the weirdness dissipates. He gratefully crawls over. Then, feeling emboldened, curls up close to Lev’s side. They are both warm and though his heart won’t calm down, Yaku feels comfortable, safe, and relaxed.

“Lev,” he hesitates, not sure if he wants to push this. To probe what’s between them. Then again, can they really keep waffling uncertainly? He has to know. “Lev, do you like me?”

It comes out aggressive. Not at all like he intended.

“Yeah, I like you,” Lev answers without pause, but turns to face him, wearing a slightly confused expression.

“No. I mean,” He flicks his eye up. “Do you like me more than… more than just a friend?”

Lev licks his lips and his head dips low. It signals a quiet nod of affirmation to Yaku.

“How long?” he finds himself demanding.

Lev’s gaze is steady and he looks almost ethereal with the light coming behind him creating a halo around his gray hair. “A long time. Probably since high school.” He smiles shyly. “I always thought you were so cool.”

The momentary silence that falls seems almost endless before it’s broken by a deep breath.

“I wanted to be next to you all the time,” Lev admits. “And I think you have a great face. It’s really cute. And I want to kiss you all the time.” He laughs shakily. “All the time.”

“Why don’t you?” The words are out of his mouth before Yaku can think.

Lev’s eyes widen and his own mouth slacks open. “You mean…”

Trying to keep his composure, Yaku shrugs.

Suddenly, Lev’s long fingers are sliding up his neck to cup around his jaw. Hot breath fans across his face before the half-Russian is looming right in front of him. Gently, as if waiting for Yaku to protest or pull away, he pushes in, angling his face slightly until their lips meet. Yaku sucks in some air through his nose and kisses back, lips closing over his companion’s.

Once they break apart, Yaku fixes his eyes on Lev’s which have become hooded, green slits. A pink tongue slides slowly between the seam of his thin lips while they continue to stare at each other. By some kind of weird sixth sense, he can tell Lev’s about to start talking. But if they talk anymore, who knows what they’ll say. He grabs Lev’s head, admittedly a little roughly, and pulls him back into another kiss. This one is more fervent like there’s a purpose behind it. If Yaku’s driving that purpose he’s not sure where it’s taking them.

Lev’s lips feel smooth under his, and soon they start opening and closing their mouths in unison. Taking shuddering breaths together, letting the wetness and heat grow between them. Every pause has his brain stalling with the thought, _I’m making out with Lev Haiba_. He feels giddy. Weird. Out-of-control. He feels damn good. _I’m making out with Lev Haiba._ He lingers with his tongue inside the other’s mouth. _I’m making out with a guy. A guy who’s nearly three years younger than me._ Never in a thousand years could Yaku have predicted this. It’s probably the weirdest thing he’s ever experienced. Including traveling to Russia. He feels like he’s outside his body watching an accident happen. The kind that disturb and scare you, but that you can’t look away from.

As he lapses into a kind of stasis, Lev takes over the kissing and crawls over Yaku, pushing his back down into the bed. He’s being kissed all over, smothered by the half-Russian above him. He has his hands tightly clenched on Lev’s mop of long hair, occasionally brushing along the buzzed sides with sharp nails. Anything slightly pain inducing has the younger gasping above him which he is eager to hear more of.

“Tell me if you want to stop,” Lev instructs as he moves to lie on his side next to Yaku, who can only nod dumbly. Their lips fit together and this time the kisses are slow and measured, a little sloppy, and a lot sweet. Yaku lets himself get lost in it, one hand petting down Lev’s chest, the other fisted in his hair. Lev’s tongue licks around his mouth curiously and languidly, every once in a while, stroking the roof of it and making the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. He’s got one arm around Yaku’s middle and slides his hand up and down in a weird rhythmic cycle.

“Mmm…” Yaku murmurs as Lev pulls back.

“Good?” the other asks.

 _Good? Is he nuts?_ This is more than Yaku’s ever dreamed of, even in his gayest fantasies. The way they lie side by side, touching from torsos to toes. The way Lev leans slightly over him, green eyes hooded and smoldering. The way his hand still pushes up against his robe, nearly burning him. Yaku wants him so much it kind of hurts. He nods again in answer.

“Is it okay? I mean,” Lev stops, eyes glazed with worry as he stares into the corner of the room. “Do you want this. You don’t have to because I said I like you.”

Yaku just blinks at him in confusion. _What is he talking about?_ When his brain finally catches up, he pushes himself up to match Lev’s level on his elbow. “Lev.” He flicks the other gently in the forehead with one finger. “Are you dense?”

Lev just looks more scared than he did a minute ago, Yaku realizes this requires a real, drawn out confession from him. “Of course it’s okay.” He explains in exasperation. “Maybe I didn’t have a crush on you for as long as you did on me, but I do like you.” He heaves a huge sigh before continuing, “I like you a lot. You may not know this, but I don’t agree to go on extended trips across continents with just anyone.”

Lev’s face looks a little more hopeful and now that’s he on a roll, Yaku keeps talking.

“I think you’re handsome, and funny, and smart, and sweet, and you take care of me, and you get excited about things like shoes and old bibles, and I just really like you, okay? I wanted to come here and I want to be with you, and I want to keep kissing you.”

Lev has a dazed look on his face like someone just smacked him with a ten-pound weight. Right when he’s finished speaking, he sits up and throws his arms around his neck. “Mori-san!”

Yaku is nearly flattened under the pressure. Luckily, Lev gets off quickly, eager to kiss him again, sliding their mouths together with a wet, smacking kiss. He whispers excitedly next to his ear. “I really, really like you too Mori.” Some of the faster babblings he doesn’t catch, caught up in the shivers running across his skin. Others he can make out like, “you’re so good”, “you look so good”, “wanna make you feel good”, and lots of long sighs and little laughs.

Yaku smiles into their next kiss, laughing a little when they both move to sit up and Lev’s hands don’t leave his face, leveraging up with mostly with his elbows. Once comfortable, with Yaku nearly sitting on his lap, he takes initiative and kisses Lev slowly, pushing in and lingering in the other’s mouth.

“You’re really good at this.” Lev gasps.

“Yeah?” Yaku has to stifle his smile against his cheek.

“Well, you’re really good at everything, so I guess it’s not a surprise.” His breathing has slowed and quickly he scatters a few kisses across Yaku’s nose and cheeks. “You probably dated a lot in college, huh?”

Yaku scrunches his nose in consternation. “Not really, no.”

“That’s too bad,” Lev sighs a kiss over the side of his forehead. “Everyone else was missing out.”

Yaku has to resist the urge to roll his eyes. Then, the thought of this new, lean Lev dating his way through screaming volleyball fans enters his consciousness. It might have seemed too far-fetched to imagine the tactless first year doing such things, but after kissing the present Lev, it doesn’t seem like such a stretch. “Did you?”

“I guess.” He shoots a blinding smile at him between kisses to Yaku’s face. “I like dating.”

Yaku might have guessed Lev would be weird enough to actually enjoy the tediousness of college relationships. He must have made a face because the kisses suddenly cease.

“Does that make you jealous?”

Instead of answering honestly, which would have revealed a bit too much personal information for Yaku’s liking, he just deflects with, “You’re incorrigible.” before claiming Lev’s mouth again.

“You know what I like most about dating?” He asks the question as soon as they pause for breath.

“What?”

“You get to have someone to just love and love and love!”

The excitement in his voice and the huge grin on Lev’s face cause Yaku to break into a fit of giggles. “Well, I can’t wait to love you, ” he says once he’s calmed down.

“Yeah. I can’t wait to love you too, except I think I’ve been loving you for a long time.”

A feeling blooms in Yaku’s chest and it's something too big put in words. Instead, he settles on one, “Same.”

 

“Mori. Morisuke.”

Yaku wakes to tiny kisses being pressed lightly over his cheeks and forehead.

“Hey, Baby.” He opens his eyes and Lev comes into focus. Though he gets out a groan, he can’t completely hide the smile that overtakes his face at the pet name. Tossing around on the laughably huge Travelodge mattress, he pulls the covers over and faces the wall, trying to ignore Lev’s persistent touches.

“Lev, I’m so tired.”

“I know. I know.” Though he sounds consoling, he keeps shaking Yaku’s shoulder. “I’m so bored, and I want to hang out before we have to go back to Japan.”

Yaku sits up to face his new boyfriend feeling all at once irritated and charmed. “You’re dressed,” he says in surprise.

Lev is indeed, fully-clothed, and not in his wrinkled outfit from the day before. “You slept a long time, so I went out and got our bags this morning. And I got breakfast,” he bounces off the bed and holds out a hand to display the plastic bags of food and juice on the counter.

“Wow. Thanks.”

“Mmm…” Lev sinks down next to him again, “Did I do a good job? Am I being a good boyfriend?”

“Sure. Could be a little better if you let the person with actual Exhaustion sleep for a little longer, but you did pretty well.”

Yaku gets a perfect pout in response. “If I let you sleep anymore you’d probably never get up!”

“Probably not.” he admits.

“Mori!”

Snickering, Yaku attempts to get out of bed but immediately loses his balance due to a rush of blood to the head. He crashes sideways against the bedside table making it shudder and everything atop it tremble. Lev scrambles up looking alarmed.

“Sorry. Dizzy.”

Lev doesn’t say anything, just watches as Yaku makes his way to the bathroom to wash up. Once he emerges, feeling a little more awake and refreshed, he settles on the bed and tries not to jolt when Lev takes hold of his hand and kisses the side of his head.

“Feel okay?”

“Yeah, just tired.”

They eat quietly, watching the sun get brighter and the city come to life outside the window. Between bites they discuss the trip so far and their plans for flying back later in the afternoon. It’s peaceful, easy being with Lev like this. Whenever their skin brushes together or he starts blabbering excitedly, Yaku’s heart rate picks up in response. But he can tell Lev’s being careful, dancing around their new relationship; afraid Yaku’s going to shut him down if he does something too unexpected. After they pack up and double check the room, he decides to make the next move.

“Ready to go home?”

Lev hums pensively.

“I am. I can’t wait to sleep in my own bed.” He doesn’t miss Lev’s sympathetic look. “I might need you to come over. Help get me relaxed.”

“You want me to whisper to you again?” he asks.

“Nah, I was thinking of something else that might get us both tired.” He feels incredibly stupid for just saying it, and even more so when Lev looks at him in confusion.

“Oh, you want to play volleyball?”

Yaku smacks his own face, if only because Lev’s is out of reach. “No, Idiot! I meant we should have sex.”  

His face goes crimson and he chokes a little. “Oh. Yeah. We can do that.”

“You sure?” Yaku rolls his eyes.

“Mmmhmm.” he leans down and places a quick kiss to the invisible scar on the side of his mouth. Yaku rises on tiptoes and catches his chin, deepening the kiss. They stay there for an awkward minute, meeting between their heights and pressing and pulling at each other. “We can definitely do that.” Lev finishes, straightening back up.

“Good.” Yaku pulls on his backpack and grabs Lev’s hand before leading them out the door.

 

As their departing flight trundles along the tarmac, light from the sunset flickers in strips across Yaku’s face from various windows, at once warming and chilling him with the finality of their trip coming to a close. Many passengers are already shutting shades to block out the stare of the sun. Being near the aisle, he has no choice but to wait out the flashing light and shadows spilling in stripes all over the cabin. He closes his eyes and lets it wash over him.

They’ve had a long day of train rides to get to the airport and then had to wait in lines for processing to get boarded. Yaku feels his Exhaustion taking over. Lev, bouncing in the window seat next to him, is still full of energy, however. He winks excitedly when Yaku peeks one eye over at him.

“I love the feeling of taking off.” he tells him.  

The plane is currently meandering down a runway, so they don’t have long. Yaku shuts his eyes again and lets the vibrations of the engine rattle him. His boyfriend takes hold of his hand and gently starts tickling up and down his forearm. Probably for nothing else than to keep his fidgety hands busy. _Feels nice._

“Thanks for coming with me Mori.”

“Anytime,” he mumbles.

“Does that mean we can come again?”

“Sure.”

He feels sleepy. Safe here with Lev next to him. The engine increases the vibrations and the rolling of wheels turns into a rush of speed. The tickling stops and his hand is tugged into Lev’s. Yaku opens his eyes to see the tarmac suddenly jump below them. Lev leans his head against the window and watches Russia get smaller and smaller, finally closing the shade once it’s all a blur. Now he focuses on Yaku. Brushing a hand through the hair on his forehead and smiling softly.

“Tired?”

“Always.” he admits.

Lev leans in and kisses him softly. “I love you.”

Yaku’s heart thunks heavily in his chest. They barely confessed to each other yesterday and so far have only kissed and held hands. _Are they already at the I Love You stage?_ Maybe he should feel weirder about this. Maybe it should be a more significant moment. But looking up into Lev’s eyes and feeling that familiar tingle under his gaze makes him feel right. Like he always has.

Lev drives him crazy, has always gotten under his skin, but he’s always there. They’ve both changed a lot over the years and some things are different between them, but this will always be the same.

“I love you too.”

* * *

1\. [You are Japanese, Correct?]↩  
2\. [Well done]↩  
3\. [I like talking to you.]↩  
4\. [Not good]↩  
5\. [You are doing so well.]↩

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for your support! You can follow me on http://meganin.tumblr.com/ if you want. Don't be afraid to send HCs or story ideas. I would love it! (Read: I have no friends)


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